A CASE OF MISTAKEN IDENTITY

Yesterday was rather a busy day for me by the time I at last collapsed into my neglected bed I was a tired to death. It was a this moment that Pa decided to ask me in which of the three freezers he could find the diced pork., as I had originally asked him to take some out to defrost at around six in the evening I was not amused.

I made my lack of jollity know the the boys and informed them that if two grown men could not between then find a pack of pork dice then it was no surprise that the world was in a total mess!

Time passed and it's passing was accompanied by the slamming of freezer lids and much cursing,then footsteps on the stairs.

With my brain drifting in a fog of tiredness I heard a voice telling me that there was no pork in the freezer. While I knew perfectly well that this was utter rubbish I told the messenger,which happened to be my son to “Just get out some frozen chicken breasts instead.” My voice sounded odd perhaps I was asleep and dreaming all this?

Dinner was to have been a slow cooked spiced pork and fruit dish .this was to have been served with cous cous and naan bread. In the apparent absence of pork chicken would do just as well. More muttering from downstairs culminating a voice calling none to softly to tell me that Pa did not want chicken. My patience at an end I informed the pair of them that I did not give a …....... what they defrosted and to sort it out amongst themselves, I turned over and slept.

Venison.......venison......of all the things they could have defrosted they chose venison!!!

There was not a chance that it would do for the meal I had planned and I was furious, my plan for a simple but tasty meal had vanished and I was left with a packet of stewing venison.

During breakfast,which was merrier than I would have thought possible I decided to make a venison pudding,similar to the rabbit and bacon one I made last week, the boys remarked would “Have to Lump it!”

I looked for the first time at the alleged pack of diced venison, it did not look right, and upon opening the bag I discovered the what I actually had in hand was a pound of very good steak and kidney...and yes, both the boys can read!”

I was delighted as I adore steak and kidney pudding although I seldom get any as my son,who has never tasted it swears that he loathes kidney!

With a small prayer to providence I made the pastry for the pudding, lined the basin, packed it with the meat some sliced onion and a few small mushroom added the stock,.put on a pastry lid and having wrapped it we popped it into a steamer.

Five hours later we were tucking in to a glorious steak and kidney pudding, the suet (duff) pastry was golden and light and tasted delicious served with mushy peas and a good beef gravy.

My son ate his pudding kidney and all then came back for seconds. He said that he was not enamoured of the kidney but he had enjoyed to meal.

Pa too had seconds I was pleased to note, so in the end all was well.

I would like to say that the moral here is to label items in the fridge but it is not, the moral is the read the bloody labels that poor saps such as myself have gone to the trouble to write!!!!!

As I finish tonight’s blog a war is raging downstairs as to weather there is or is not any diced chicken

As a matter of fact there is,I know, because I put it there.

I shall now retire gibbering to the bathroom!