OUT LOOK UNSETTLED

Tomorrow I am off to see the Doctor, not my Doctor, a Doctor, you see I am in the unusual position in that my own G,P and the G.P I saw when she was absent both left in the same week. This has lead to confusion as shortly before she left my doctor had sent me for a scan as I had been experiencing severe pain much identical to that caused by the kidney stone I suffered from some years ago.

Off I went , had the test and two days later the other Doctor called to say that they had found a stone and some thing else ( she did not really specify what) and that I would be refereed to the Urology clinic. This was about three months ago and I am still waiting for the referral to come through.
Some weeks ago I rang the surgery and was told that the referral had been requested, last week I called Urology and they knew nothing about it........hum....I suspect that somewhere along the line there has been “an oversight”.

You would be correct in thinking that I am rather anxious to know just what the “something else” that the scan revealed could be and I feel that I have waited long enough. Tomorrows appointment should be my regular blood pressure check up and prescription top up, I think that the chances of my blood pressure being normal is practically zero, add to this that I am seeing a Doctor who knows nothing about me and will most likely not have enough time to find out and you see my problem.

The last time I was obliged to see a different Doctor she messed up my medication to such an extent that I ended up very ill for several months. Why is it that a new Doctor always thinks that he or she knows better than the one you have been seeing for years and who knows you inside out , so to speak? Perhaps I am meeting trouble half way but I am afraid that bitter experience is the cause of my apprehension...time will tell.

What a pestiferous day this has been weather wise, during the course of the day I have been soaked to the skin three times in and attempt to do a little gardening, at one point I was stranded in the shed while a hail storm passed by and the stones were the size of dried peas, just what I needed, I don't think! However the strawberries are doing well and the gooseberries have plumped up nicely after a good soak last night, with luck I shall be able to make some more jam tomorrow.

My son's first night back at work after his three week break went quietly and he seemed cheerful this morning though tired, he never complains bless him and I had toast and coffee delivered to my room this morning, it was lovely to wake up to such a treat. For once I did not wake early and I put this down to the fact that I had a large glass of Jamieson whisky at around midnight. I have not touched whisky for years and I enjoyed it more than I had expected. The last time I drank the stuff was before my son was born when I had a siege with a bottle of Culross whiskey while in Scotland. I sat on the shore of Loch Ness all night with a local man famous for having seen the Beastie, we drank two bottles of Scotch an I saw absolutely nothing which tends to suggest that there is nothing to see. On the other hand I did not see any pink elephants either so perhaps I had not drunk quite enough.

Every thing looks better for a little rain except my hair which is now curling and will soon be a frizzy mess so I am off to wash it before I get too tired. Keep safe , night night.

THE WEEK BEGINS.

I love Bank Holidays, on and ordinary day I have to be awake early to sign for any parcels, of which my son receives a great multitude, if I fail to get to the door in double quick time the post man,who is the knock once and run type takes them back to the depot and I have to go and collect the blasted things. This also applies to most of the other delivery companies with the exception of Fed. Ex. Who knock and wait long enough for a disabled person to reach the door.

This morning was bliss, while Pa and my son slept on I had a quiet cup of coffee and watched the news before going down stairs to bake the days bread, five loaves today made with barley corn and wholemeal flour, a very tasty mix. The bread was in the oven and I was just about to make two trays of shortbread when there was a tap at the back door. Now I am as fond of company as the next person but when I tell you that in order to allow my son who is working tonight and Pa who did not sleep well an extra hour or so in bed,I had left all the curtains closed to discourage visitors you will understand why I was not overjoyed to have to entertain a guest while most of the household were still asleep. I would never dream of knocking on a persons door early in the morning when all the curtains were drawn and to do so on a bank holiday is in my opinion unpardonable

“Perhaps it was an emergency?” I hear you ask., and the answer to that is no it most certainly was not! I provided tea and sympathy with as good a grace as I could muster under the circumstances, shelved the shortbread until later and listened for almost an hour while my guest talked.. He is a dear man but I was still on automatic pilot and became a little distracted when I realised that I had not set the time for the bread and had no idea how long the loaves had been in the oven.

By this time I could hear the unmistakable rumblings of Pa and my son waking and no doubt wondering about breakfast as indeed was I. Eleven O clock struck and at last my guest departed, after seeing him off I retuned to my kitchen to clear away the tea things before making drinks for the boys and produce two large plates of toasted cheese for their breakfast, and poached eggs on toast for me.

The shortbread was made as soon as breakfast was over and cooked while my son and I washed up, I then packed him off to rest for a few hours, he was still very sleepy. Supplies of granulated sugar were at rock bottom as last weeks jam making consumed large amounts so I popped out to replenish our stocks as I hope to be making more jam during the next day or so.

The vegetable garden needed me as much as I needed it and so out I went leaving the other chores to “Go hang.” while I did a little hoeing up and planted out some lovely lollo rosso , red oak leaf, little gem and sangria salad plants. I was debating weather or not to water when it began to rain …...hoorah...so I went back indoors to cut my son's sandwiches for work and to prepare a soup for dinner

Every one is now fed, my son is getting ready for work and I shall soon be soaking in a nice hot bath. Another day another dolour as my mother used to say, actually the day has not been too bad and at least tomorrow I have no baking to do.......just the ironing......mother was right!

WIERD BUGS AND STRANGE BEASTIES

There has been very little time for the garden today except for a midge infested hour in the gooseberry patch to pick some of the fruit. The bushes are shade by a lovely bird cherry tree as they do like a little dappled shade, the problem is so do the midges, I still have the welts left by the little horrors after my last gooseberry picking session, today I had two and a half pounds of strawberries and needed to pick the same amount of gooseberries to make our favourite strawberry and gooseberry jam..

Strawberry jam can be difficult to set as the fruit is low in pectin. and tastes wonderful, it also keeps a good rich colour, so important in strawberry jam I think.

With the fruit washed and in the pan I anointed midge bites with Anthisan and swallowed an antihistamine tablet to be on the safe side then carried on regardless. Speed was vital as I had to have the kitchen cleared by five for the start of the birthday party, thankfully the jam reached setting point quickly and was soon safely poured into sterile jars, I cleared the kitchen and went for a bath.

Growing rather thickly up the rear wall of the house is a grape vine and accompanied by another rapidly growing plant which had begun to seriously obscure the view from the windows both upstairs and down. Yesterday our neighbour appeared with a long ladder and with the loan of my telescopic shears gave the offending plant a bit of a pruning. He was careful to leave the grape vine alone as we all enjoy being able to lean out of the upstairs windows to pick grapes while in the bath..very decadent .

I suspect that this pruning is the cause of the sudden influx of strange bugs and spiders which are currently rampaging around my bedroom, my God, last night was terrible, I barley got a wink of sleep, and the spiders, the spiders..........awful! Throughout the night I must have evicted more than twenty assorted bugs and spiders, but three in the morning I was a nervous wreck so I resorted to strong drink and helped myself to a large Brandy, a bracer you might say.

Dawn broke and found me totally shattered and with a rare and wonderful collection of critters lurking under tumblers and tooth mugs in a line across the bookshelf, These I disposed of at once and went down to breakfast feeling grim.

Half an hour later we were sitting down to toasted crumpets, a large bag of muffins had mysteriously vanished from the face of the kitchen so we filled up with toast and honey, The muffins are still missing? Apart from the occasional wasp in the jam pan the day went well and the party was a huge success. Twiggy who dislikes company camped out in the shed for a time and then arrived in the kitchen howling dismally, food was required, food was provided and the cat subsided amongst a heap of cushions with a blissful purring to show that she bore no grudge.

One of the beasties dislodged from the vine has taken a liking to my pet rose bush and has munched its way through several leaves already. I think that it is a Vapourer moth caterpillar, if any one knows better I should be glad to hear their opinion......see today's photograph.

The revellers are still carousing in the kitchen but upstairs all is quiet, the cat is still purring and the spiders are still stamping about in my room. I am too tired to care where they go, unless a tarantula appears on my bedside table ,I shall mind my own business and go to sleep....I hope!

PREPARATIONS FOR A PARTY

Tomorrow one of my sons friends is celebrating his birthday and as has become the tradition will have a party here tomorrow after the game. A chocolate cake was requested and now sits on the kitchen table while the icing sets before being covered and put safely away until tomorrow
MARKS CHOCOLATE TRUFFLE FUDGE CAKE
For the cake
6oz butter softened
6oz caster sugar
6oz self raising flour
3 eggs
1 and a half teaspoons of baking powder.

This is easy. Put all the ingredients in to a bowl and beat for 3 minutes then spoon in to two greased and lined eight inch sandwich tins. Bake for 35 minutes at 160 c

For the fudge filling and topping
12 oz icing sugar
3 oz butter
2 tablespoons of cocoa powder
2 to 4 tablespoons of single cream
1 teaspoon of vanilla essence

Sieve icing sugar and cocoa powder together.
Melt the chocolate gently in a large sauce pan, when it is melted add half the icing sugar and beat well then add the cream ,essence and the rest of the icing sugar and beat until you have a creamy mixture which will spread. Spread half the mixture on to one of the cakes and them sandwich the two together and spread the remaining chocolate on the top.

For the hazel nut and chocolate cream

4 oz butter
8 oz icing sugar I tablespoon cocoa powder
2 oz hazel nuts chopped and toasted
1 tablespoon of single cream

Chop the hazel nuts and toast in a frying pan until they smell wonderful and begin to brown.
Place the butter, sugar, cocoa powder and cream in a bowl and beat well. The mixture should almost double in volume and become pale. Add the cooled toasted nuts and beat again for a few moments then spread the mixture around the outside edges of the cake.

For the finishing touch
about a table spoon of fine dark chocolate shavings
About a dozen round truffles, I used Tescos Swiss truffles but you could use any as long as they are round.
Sprinkle the chocolate shavings over the top of the cake.
Cut the truffles in half and push them firmly in to the hazelnut icing around the sides of the cake if there are any left use them to make a pattern on the top, or just eat them and say no more. You deserve a treat.

Apart from a little desultory shopping and tea with the neighbours that has been all for today.
We had gammon and eggs for dinner and then a photograph show of my sons huge collection of holiday snaps which was lovely, it will take ages to look at all of them as he took over a thousand .

Another nest of blackbirds fledged today and a nest on wrens, the spotty young robins are still in evidence and several young parakeets are favouring our feeding tables . The rain has done wonders for the garden and for now my equilibrium has been restored. Long may it last.

CHANCE, MISCHANCE AND HAPPENSTANCE!

The day began with me in a panic as late last night Pa had broken the news that the tumble dryer has conked out, this news coming just as I had been asleep for about twenty minutes this news was sufficient to prevent me from dropping off again until the early hours of the morning. I have observed that if a household appliance is going to go on the fritz it invariably does it on a Friday,meaning of course that it will usually be Monday at the earliest before the repair man can come, this is a bank holiday weekend so we would be lucky if we could expect him before Tuesday....bum, blast and bugger!

I got up early and made coffee for all and then went downstairs to call the repair man in the vain hope that if I called early enough he just might come today. Roused from a deep sleep Pa muttered that I might like to try the dryer as he thought that it was working after all. I tried it....it worked! With murder in my heart I stalked out of the room unable to trust myself not to at least say something very rude. Why did he not tell me that he had been mistaken? Because he did not want to wake me up. Aaaaaaaaaaargh!

Still it was good news and I filled the machine full of towels and got on with the breakfast preparations, blueberry muffins, after which I made three large loaves for the weekend and at this point the grocery delivery arrived, well sort of. You see for some reason best known to themselves the supermarket had sent four large packs of smoked bacon which was not what we ordered, we all detest the stuff. Only one pack of prosciutto arrived instead of two, if I continue with the list of discrepancies it will become boring , suffice it to say that as soon as the driver had departed I was obliged to hare off to the shops to purchase the missing items many of which we needed for today, bum, blast and bugger!

On my return I commenced the cleaning of the kitchen, which as it will be the venue for a birthday party for a friend of my son's on Sunday needed and extra do and Was chagrined to find that Pa had for some reason covered the kitchen floor with glass bottles, bird seed and such a mass of tat that I could not see the kitchen floor or the sofa in the living room. I bit my tongue again, by now it was getting quite sore and went upstairs fuming, blast, damn and bugger!

My son managed to get Pa out of the way and I rearranged the living room furniture to make room for Sundays party and finished cleaning the kitchen., while my son hovered upstairs ready for me to steam. Pa had been asked to put the bags of jam jars, kindly donated by friends and neighbours in to the buggy hutch by the front door, as they were already in the hall by now this should have taken minutes. Quite a long while later the fog in my brain cleared a little and I wondered what all the crashing and smashing noise out side in the garden was about? Pa had decided to sort out the bottles, God knows why since he has no idea at all which sizes I shall want first, there were dozens of bottles all over the path, the sky was black and it was spotting with rain. Oh arse!

The cleaning was done the hoovering was finished all that now remained was for me to steam the floors and carpets...................can you guess what happened next boys and girls............quite right, the steam had ceased to function. **!!!!***...***!!!!!. I was speechless !

There was nothing for it but to order a new one and in the mean time buy a mop.

Now it transpires that Pa knew the steamer was not working as it had not worked when he attempted to use it over a week ago, to make matters worse I remembered him going on about the steamer not working correctly but after all the nonsense about the washing machine I erroneously assumed that this was another of his …...misapprehensions shall we say. More fool me!

I opened a can of beer drank it quickly while wondering what on earth I had done to deserve my fate.
Perhaps in a past life I was a mass murderer, or worse a banker or a politician, it would have to be something really bad that much was certain.

Resigned to my fate I laid the table for our evening meal, which was a real bright spot in an otherwise appalling day, we tucked in and enjoyed ourselves and while not exactly laughing in the face of adversity we did begin to see the funny side, almost.
In fact we had a lovely meal and we laughed and joked as we planned to capture a small island and live there in peace, what to do with the natives however was the difficulty, some how O do not think that the people of Sark or Eriskay would leave quietly, do you?

THE TRIUMPH OF HOPE

Last night I felt as low as I ever wish to feel,some times when I lose sight of hope I come close to despair. When I am very tired and in pain I seem to be unable to resist negative thoughts and this is certainly not the fault of poor Pa bless him. I want to lash out and of course I cannot and so I am sorry to say that any one unfortunate enough to read my blog on a bad day gets the lot.

I woke first again this morning and although the sky was dark and threatened rain I was cheered. You see today I had a good deal of cleaning to do and so the weather being bad meant that I would not be fretting about the garden as I could not work out doors in the rain, also the young vegetables and the fruit needs water, as the rain began to fall my spirits lifted,it was a good start to the day.

Pa seemed brighter when I took him a coffee and managed to get up without too much prodding from me. Our breakfast today was a Staffordshire delicacy called a Piklet, they are a type of flat, slightly sweet crumpet which can be sprinkled with sultanas during the cooking which is done on a griddle. Today we ate ours plain with butter and maple syrup and listened to more travellers tales from my sons holiday. While he was on Sark he took over a thousand photographs and I must say the place looks idyllic, he is quite a good photographer, he gets lots of practice you see.

After breakfast the chores began punctuated by the arrival of three parcel deliveries which was fun. One of these parcels contained Pa's new curtains and voiles, cream curtains , purple voiles to compliment the décor in his room. We all downed tools and with a little help from my son we managed to take down the old ones and put the new ones up in no time at all. These touches finishing touches make all the difference and we are all pleased with the result, especially Pa.
His room has been planned with care because of his special needs with comfy chair and everything he needs to hand, the result is cosy attractive and comfortable.

After a quick coffee I tackled the bathroom and became very hot and bothered but the job was soon finished and everywhere shone. Somehow after the grimness of yesterday everything seemed lighter and brighter in spite of the rain and cloud. During the afternoon a very loud peel of thunder rolled and rumbled about, I saw no lightening but the thunder was so loud that it made me jump and the cat who was watching me clean the window shot under the bed and refused to come out for quite a while.

Dinner was a simple meal of bacon, eggs and mushrooms with fried tomatoes followed by iced cream, simple to cook and easy to clear away and Pa was on time for the meal, for the first time in days. Tonight we are having a show of my sons holiday snaps which I am really looking forward to and then I hope a good nights sleep will follow.

Wow! Another loud thunder clap this time with flashes of lightening, torrential rain and a wind so strong that the trees are thrashing about, I can hear the big tree at the bottom of the garden creaking alarmingly as the wind tears through. The curtain of rain is obscuring the view and the water is bouncing high in the lane and forming a river as it flows by the end of the garden. I do love a spectacular storm, providing of course that I am safely and snugly indoors.

I am so very glad that the hopeless feelings of yesterday have passed, the human spirit is disposed to hope and a good thing too or where should we be.

PA.

There are times when I ask myself. “Why can't I have a normal family, like everyone else.” Today was one of those days!. I hit the ground running, metaphorically speaking at seven and as everyone else was still blissfully somnolent I did some quite dusting, quite a lot of quiet dusting as by eight thirty every one was still asleep. Being I kind and thoughtful soul I made coffee for all and took it round the various rooms like a blasted waiter on room service duty.

Pa had an opticians appointment at eleven and I remanded him of this several times in rising tones of panic as time passed without much movement from the old curmudgeon. By dint of threats and gentle coaxing I managed to get him to the table and we breakfasted of pancakes with lemon and sugar cooked in relays by yours truly while the rest of the pack took their ease and stuffed their faces, typical.

After much ado I OT him out of the house and on the road only slightly late and returned exhausted to the kitchen where the dishes , the bread making and the preparation of a roast guinea fowl with all the trimmings awaited my attention. I t was then that I noticed that the dryer was full of wet sheets? The washing machine was full of unwashed underwear and I realised that Pa was still obsessing about the spin speed on the washing machine.

This latest fixation has been the cause of much strife during the past two weeks and unless I supervise every load myself the result is that the washing does not get done. Before I could begin the days bread making I was obliged to sort out the washing as there is an underpants shortage due to Pa's little peccadillo. I went about the kitchen like and old witch muttering spells and it was well that the culprit was absent during this time! I finished the job, got out the dough trough, assembled the ingredients but before I could begin there was a knock at the door.....two for tea and biscuits, actually I did not mind as they are friends who are always welcome and the came with a bag of jam jars which are like gold dust in these parts at this time of year, and a beautiful painting done by the lady as a thank you for the jam I have sent to them in the past. It was a pleasant interlude but it slowed my=e down considerably.

I made the bread and was about to clear the kitchen when another caller arrived, barely fifteen minute after the others had left, some days I really do feel as if I am running a café. The trouble is that they are all such delightful people that I am always glad to see them, the bad part is that the garden and the housework suffers while I entertain the hoards! I put the risen dough in to the oven and resigned sat down with yet another cup of tea.

Alone at last and with the bread cooling I began the preparations for dinner and it was then that I noticed the time.....Where the hell was Pa......and what the hell was taking so long.....I called......no answer. Fuming I got on with a few other jobs and at one thirty I called again, still no answer. When after many attempts I managed to contact the old so and so he told me that he was on his way and would be home soon. Imagine then my chagrin when and hour passed without any sign of the abscent Pa.

Things were getting serious as it was past three and I needed to think about putting the bird in to roast, as I pondered this minor catastrophe Pa rolled down the path with the air of one who has hurried all the way, I was not convinced.. After another hours faffing about the old rogue, who was in a teasing mood went out to feed the birds, this was his job, note the singular, this is because I did just about everything else .Obviously it should be done in the morning but he gets later and later even on a day when he has nothing else to do. It is not motivation he needs, what he actually needs is a stick of dynamite you know where.

I am aware that I am venting steam and I apologise, you see it is pointless to say this to Pa as he would just do even more things to wind me up and I am at the ropes end.

I have come to the conclusion that the more I worry about him the more he plays upon my fears for his health. He has as I have mentioned lost a lot of weight for no apparent reason and in order to build him up I have been cooking things that he likes and making treats to boost his calorie intake.
Knowing this he torments me by coming to the dinner table two hours late. This means that I am spending hours holding meals for him and some things just will not hold.

Tonight will be the last time the rest of us wait while our meal spoils because he insists upon playing the damned silly ass! As of tomorrow meals will be served at a particular time, incidentally this is vital when my son I working nights, and if he does not show up on time he will not eat.



This has been a very bad day, that is a fact, tomorrow may be better and if it is not then it must be faced. The truth is that I am afraid that I may not have the strength to continue with this seemingly hopeless cause and yet I cannot give up. I know that I need to rest and yet there is no rest for some one in my position, ask any full time carer and they will tell you the same. What will happen to him if I become to frail to look after him any more, this thought keeps me going but by my actions I am bringing the dreadful day closer and I cannot bear the thought. One thing of which I am certain is that I shall not allow my son to shoulder the burden, that thought is the hardest of all and it will never happen, that I guarantee. My wonderful son is my rock and yet it is his very goodness which makes me fear for the future,his future and makes me so determined that he shall not suffer as I have.

If I did not love Pa I would not care at all about his health and welfare, yet he is a different person now , one I barely recognise,he is a stranger, uncaring and selfish instead of thoughtful and kind. It is for past time that I now continue to care, I can do no less for such a good man as he was once. I have already lost him and that is what is so hard to face.

Today the sun has shone, the garden positively glowed in the afternoon light and all around the sights and sounds of early summer wove their magic, what a wretch I am to complain when all this beauty is spread out for my pleasure. Now as the light fades except for the final gilding of the tree tops as the sun sinks low I see how lucky I really am to have so much to wonder at .

Please do not be concerned, I am just getting the days pain out of my system in the only way I can and I am sure that tomorrow I shall feel much better. My little cat replete after a meal of guinea fowl scraps is seeking attention, there is nothing quite like a cats company for calming the nerves. Tomorrow, will be better.

LAZY, LATE AND LOVING IT

Dinner last night was a merry meal, a huge order of Chinese take away, lots of sarsaparilla and the epic tale of my sons journey home. Thanks to the fact that he ended up having to fly in top Gatwick he was home much earlier that expected which left us lots of time for a good old yarn.

The first rays of sunlight woke me as usual in the summer months and I watched the world waking up while I sipped a cup of coffee before returning to bed for a couple of hours, as I had no intention of rousting the others out of bed until much later. By nine thirty I had made my bed , tidied my room and had administered refreshments to the sleepy men folk and another for myself.

Having promised my son a breakfast of home made waffles on his first day home I repaired to the kitchen to honour my promise and by eleven we were all tucking in, we all love waffles but we all hate the shop bought ones and they really are not at all difficult to make if you have the correct equipment. More travellers tales accompanied the meal and we took our time and enjoyed the entertainment.

With the dishes cleared away I went out for a spin on the buggy and for once I took my MP3 player with me. I whizzed about the lanes with Simon and Garfunkel, and Blue Oyster Cult and The Mamas and the Papas playing as I went, which shows what and ancient old party I am . There has I feel been a dead patch in the music business for quite a time but now there are some real musicians out there again and at last something worth listening to. Music is important to me and I like all types from Medieval to modern and most things in between,I am a huge fan of Al Bowlly of whom you have probably never heard. What ever it is I will listen to it...if I am in the mood.

The garden needed attention after last nights gale and I wondered around the garden muttering darkly about the weather in general as I tied up flowers laid low during the night. The wind is still strong enough to do damage and I thank the Gods that I had the foresight to plant my tomatoes indoors this year or I suspect that the cursing would have been more vitriolic.

I have been attempting to clear the back log of laundry caused by the demise of my washing machine a few weeks ago but I am fighting a loosing battle, I have three laundry baskets and at the moment none of the lids will close.........tough, today I can not be asked!

A tray of tea in the garden seemed like a good idea so in the afternoon I loaded up the tray complete with biscuits and ginger cake and settle down to watch the birds and the fox cubs going about their business, No more work today I told myself. From time to time the wind blew a variety of objects in to the garden, plastic carrier bags, crisp packets and a large straw hat. No of this surprised or disturbed me at all, some years ago after a very stormy night I found a blonde wig caught up in the hedge at the end of the garden, along with two chickens and a shed roof, after that I became inured to such occurrences, nothing phases me these days.

I kept another promise at dinner and cooked for my son his favourite pasta dish, chicken pomodori, neither Pa or I can stand this dish having eaten it far too often so for us I coked a pasta carbonara, which is very quick and easy and can be done in one pan,followed by a lemon cheese cake. This meal was accompanied by still more travellers tales. I it wonderful to have my son home again, he can light up a room with his irrepressible good humour and his quirky sense of fun.

I really must check my e mails tomorrow, I have been very lazy about doing so of late, but not today, today is for rest and relaxation and for once I do not feel even slightly guilty about doing so little . The cat Twiggy is herself again now that we are all at home again, she has cavorted abut the garden all day but keeps conning in to check that he is still here, she is such a little love.

Next on my lazy day agenda is a long soak in a hot bath and then to bed with a cup of tea and hopefully my little cat for company. Good night one and all.

LIFES LITTLE UPS AND DOWNS

Early this morning I was awakened by an almighty crash, by the time I had reached to window to see what was occurring the only obvious thing was the fact that the wind was very high and the trees were bending and swaying in a most alarming fashion. Much rumbling and clattering followed and a dustbin hove in to view bowling merrily down the road spewing its contents as it went on its way.

Two things immediately rose to the surface in my sleep fogged brain. Firstly, today my son travels home on the ferry and secondly the possible damage to the garden. These two alarming thoughts were enough to concentrate my mind and I quickly dresses and called my son. Thankfully he seemed confident that all would be well and having next assured myself that the garden was fine I set about getting breakfast.

Before the tea had even brewed we had a guest at the table and I was cooking for three instead of two. This was not at all inconvenient as it saved my the bother of calling to let him know that his daughters cake was ready to be collected. By the time our guest departed the wind was tearing through the trees in the lane and I decided to go to the garden centre to purchase some canes to support my poor besieged plants.

There is little doubt that I chose the wrong day to bring home a dozen eight foot canes on the buggy, the lane was littered with bits of tree some of them quite large, I made it home but it was damned hard work. Pa and I were having coffee when my son called, the ferry had broken down, his mobile phone was on the fritz and he was flying home! With that bombshell we had to be content. I must say that whenever my son travel his journeys are invariably fraught with difficulties of every sort. I swallowed a tranquillizer and carried on!

Five O clock arrived and so did a text from my son to say that he had landed at Gatwick and was on a train heading for Clapham, my relief was great, bur not for long. My mother called to tell me that my brother and his wife are likely to be stranded in foreign parts by the volcanic eruption on Iceland. She cannot remember exactly were in the world they are and so aim hoping that they chose somewhere south of here. News reports say that the ash cloud will not cause as much disruption this time, let us pray!

On hearing that our wandering hero would be home by seven I gleefully cancelled my plans to cook some fish for dinner and elected to order takeaway when he arrived home, for once I really did not fell at all like cooking so that worked out well for me.

Travellers tales over dinner, and my son safe home , could anything be better, I think not.

JAM TODAY

Determined that today I would begin the jam making season I was “up betimes” and off to the supermarket for a few essentials. I have a birthday cake to make this week and I needed some special chocolate and some Belgian truffles, more about this another time.

By the time I returned Pa was ready for his breakfast which today was hot buttered crumpets and muffins with honey. He had managed to lay the table for breakfast himself and it looked very nice and neat, he even remembered the glasses, I was so pleased as I needed to be quick.

With breakfast over and the dishes washed and dried I was in the garden by noon armed with a pair of hitch gloves, a pair of secateurs and a very large bowl for the gooseberries. The actual making of gooseberry jam is easy, it is in fact the easiest to make of all jams,as it sets with very little trouble ,as long as the fruit is not too ripe, the difficult and rather painful part is picking the blessed things.

Gooseberries protect themselves from the likes of me with a multitude of long sharp thorns. Moreover these thorns have the habit of breaking off as they puncture the skin leaving a nasty almost invisible tip buried in your flesh. My experience of these little horrors is that no amount of poking about with a sterile needle will shift them and so unless I get one in a really inconvenient place I leave them until they begin to festers a little and then they pop out quite readily. This is not so nasty as it sounds and it is a lot less painful that the needles and tweezers!

Once the fruit is picked, and I picked four pounds today, it is necessary to remove the tops and tails, these being the stalk and the remains of the flower, this takes forever! Usually I do not mind this job as it is nice to snip away while the mind wanders where it will, today however I was against the clock and was inclined to say a rude word to every single gooseberry, especially those which rolled across the floor to be chased by the cat and slipped upon by unwary visitors.

When at last the fruit was in the pan, the jars sterilising in the oven and the lids scalded and dried I made Pa and I a cup of coffee and heaved a huge sigh of relief. Soon the jam was ready, as I mentioned before setting point is reached quite quick;y with green gooseberry jam and I poured it quickly in to the hot jars. eleven in total. Hot gooseberry jam smells delectable and pervades to whole ground floor of the house with he scent of blissful stickiness , the jars looked lovely and glowed in the light from the kitchen window.

With the days business done Pa and I had dinner, nothing particular, just some scampi, salad and chips with my special lemon sauce, very quick and making few dirty dishes. Cleaning up after making jam is the worst part of the whole job, no matter how careful you are you will always find a sticky patch hours later and in an inconvenient spot. I have promised Pa that he can have some of the new jam for breakfast tomorrow on toasted oven bottom muffins. Gooseberry jam keeps for over a year but it tastes really wonderful when it is newly made.

Today is my sons last day on Sark and he has spent the day walking on the west side of the island. This holiday has given him a taste for island life and I think he will be visiting other islands very soon. My son and I share a love of solitude, we both like people but we need to be by ourselves as often as possible. I would not say that a dessert island would be my ideal but should I ever find myself stranded on one of them I should not be too concerned about the lack of company.

We are looking forward to having our son at home again and to listen to is travellers tales, always so entertaining, just now though all I really want is a great big hug.

THE FLESH IS WEAK

This morning the garden was again a priority but before I could go out to play I had to bake two large sticky gingerbread cakes and four dozen cookies. Yesterday I was caught without a cookie in the place, thank heavens I still had a few slices of banana cake left to hand around. We really have been almost overwhelmed with callers this week, I think perhaps people are keeping an eye on us as they know our son is away........if he set this up I shall marmalise him......we have not had a moments peace all week!

The cakes and cookies were made while Pa was still in bed and by the time he was ready for breakfast I had cleared the kitchen, made a herb and milk infusion for a sauce to be eaten with dinner ans opened the greenhouse windows...phew!
Both of us liked the idea of pancakes so I made a batch and for the first time in ages we did not have guests for breakfast, after the week we have had it seemed rather odd. With breakfast over and the dishes done I buggied of to the florists to collect the welcome home balloon which I ordered on Monday, when I returned I was free at last to join twiggy in the garden.

My old bones were aching and my muscles were sore but I thought that some exersise would shake the knots out so I got out the mower and cut the grass paths I the flower garden them edged them neatly, it make such a difference to the gardens appearance and besides I love the smell of cut grass.
With that in mind I decided to strim the pathways in the vegetable garden and through the orchard, I leave the orchard as long as possible to give the bluebells a chance to seed an dindeed todat=y I only cut a swath through to the gooseberry bushes as tomorrow I begin to pick and prserve thee useful and delicious fruits.

Sunny windy days meant that every thing needed to be watered and apart from the small walled garden I managed to get round the lot. Deciding that I had had enough I went I doors to cook dinner . The pain in my knee was getting worse by the minute and so I decided to get on quickly before I was forced to stop work altogether. Thankfully the preparations I made in the morning meant that there was little left to do except to cook the meat sauce and the marrow rings and serve which I just about managed along with the washing up. Pa said that he would wipe the table for me and thankfully I limped upstairs to take some pain relief tablets and take a bath,. I fear that there will be no gardening tomorrow.

Jam making can be just as much fun.....well thats what I keep telling myself, it is certainly satisfying to see the shelves and cupbourds filling during the fine summer months with ahoard of good things for use in the winter time. Jars of home made jams, jelly and chutneymake exellent gifts at Christmas and all our friends have favourites which we make sure they receive.

One of my sons friends brings us the most amzing damson chutney made by his mother and it is always welcome, she is an excellent cook and very acomplished as she also makes and decorates edding cakes with the most spectacular and beautiful edible flowers. We swap recipes and send each other anything new which we have made, it is good to get an honest oppinion.

My son has spent his day wandering along cliff tops and seems to have spent a good deal of time searching for a dolmen, He found it at last tucked away from beiw and with not a single sign post to mark its possition. This is no was to treat the oldest structure on the island, but there, perhaps they do not care for such things on Sark. The slow pace of island life seems to have taken hold and he is feeling lazy and relaxed, for him this is a novelty believe me.

I shall now go and strap up my poor old knee and maake a hot drink before settling down to watch a film, I can not decide what to watch, perhaps The Wicked Lady or maybe The Demolition Man...hum, decisions decisions. Night, night.

PERFECT

This has been a perfect day for me as I spent almost all of it in the garden. I was up early to get Pa ready for his appointment with the optician and managed to was my hair while he was waking up. Once he had gone I was free and I could not get outside fast enough. Warm sunshine greeted me and the pair of tame robins, my constant companions as I work.

An influx of visitors had left my sadly behind with my work and I needed to clear the forget-me-not bed and cultivate it ready to be planted up with Kale and more leeks for the winter. This was quite a big job which I would normally do over a period of several days, today I simply had to finish in one go. Pulling up the forget-me-nots was easy as they have very little root, dealing with the numerous us small frogs which came hopping out of every clump took longer. They are lovely little creatures and are a sure sign of a healthy garden but they are oh so slippery and transporting them to a safe haven in the strawberry patch took ages.

Once the frogs were safe I set about turning the soil with a special digging tool given to me some time ago by an old gardener who had used it for years. It would be true to say that without this amazing gadget I would be unable to dig at all. Having roughly dug the ground and removed the worst of the weeds. I took a break from digging and built an arch from some old bits and pieces, this will give support to a passion fruit which grows amongst the ivy on the old garden wall, also some rather splendid Logan Berries which we make in to a Liqueur for Christmas. I thought it looked rather bare at the moment and not terribly attractive and so I planted the front of the arch with pink sweet peas which will I hope cover the frame in no time and improve its appearance until such time as the passion fruit came make enough growth to cover it.

By this time I was getting tired and I decided to pot up some young plants, a nice easy job to do sitting down, as I filled my potting tray with compost I was hailed from the garden gate by a passing friend, this seemed like a good excuse to make a pot of tea so downed tools and went to put the kettle on. Pa was late getting back and I was just beginning to worry when he arrived home at last and joined us for tea and cake< by three our guest had departed and I was back in the garden feeling much better for the rest.

Potting up the small plants was a pleasure, I love the feel of the sturdy young seedlings and the anticipation of what they will became later in the year. Finally I watered in all the new plants, tied up the tomatoes which are growing fast and then after tidying my tools away I went in to make our evening meal.

We had decided to have a salad tonight and so I had picked a bowl of mixed leaves from the garden and a pretty bunch of multi coloured radishes, yellow, white red, red and white and deep purple, they made an attractive addition to our meal. Corned beef, cheeses. avocado and olives with sun dried tomatoes and coleslaw filled us up nicely and we only just had room for an iced cream to finish the meal.

Today my son visited the famous walled garden on Sark and from the eulogy he gave on its great charm and beauty I do not despair of turning him in to a gardener yet, it is in his blood you see.
The garden visit was followed by a hair raising cliff walk and them dinner, he is enjoying every moment of his holiday and is sleeping well at night, I expect that will be the fresh air.

With every one of my old bones aching I shall now take a long hot bath, followed by a hot drink and then as soon as Pa is tucked in for the night I shall turn in myself. I am happy with the days work and shall sleep all the better for knowing that the digging is finished and the planting out almost finished. Soon the jam making season will be upon us but until then, for a few days I can sit back and enjoy my lovely little world.

SOLUS

Hallelujah, Praise the Lord in fact thanks be to all the Gods we managed to have a day without any callers which is just as well as both me and the cookie jar needed a rest! I was awake in time to watch the morning mist rise and vanish , always worth getting out of bed for and afterwards I made myself a coffee and watched the news while tackling a pile of ironing. I woke Pa with a coffee at nine and by eleven thirty he was breakfasting on home made waffles with maple syrup and fresh cream. Waffles are my favourite breakfast at the moment although I prefer mine with hot strawberry jam pour liberally all over.

Due to circumstances beyond my control I had to go to the shops to by a couple of new water jugs and while I was out I treated myself to some new sun glasses and a pretty floaty scarf to go with a blue top of which I am rather fond. The sun glasses are great as my old ones were hurting my nose and because I wear them all the time I am out side it was becoming unpleasant. Pa asked my to make him an appointment for an eye test and so I fixed that for tomorrow at eleven fifteen,....fun and games tomorrow morning then!

Back at home I changed grabbed a beer and went out in to the garden with a song in my heart. It was a glorious afternoon filled with dappled sunlight under the fruit trees and the songs of countless small birds, and the clatter of an old lawn mower in the distance...the sounds of summer.
The first thing I noticed was that one of my cucumber plants was looking very sick indeed, further inspection told me that its roots had been munched by some kind of bug lava chaffer perhaps or leather jacket. Apart from this minor problem all was well and looking better for yesterday evenings rain.

I planted the runner bean plants in the ground which I had begun to prepare yesterday and watered them in and then began to clear the old kale bed. Kale is a good vegetable to grow for winter use as it keeps producing lots of lovely green leaves no matter how cold it gets and if like this year it does die back a little it soon bounces back once the frost has gone. I always leave mine in until it has finished flowering as the bees love its bright yellow blossom and so do I, the flowers also taste pleasant, a cross between broccoli and asparagus in flavour. This bed will be planted with more leeks and this years kale will be planted in the ground where I grew peas last year.

I spoke to my son several time today, the boat trip took three hours and was amazing, he visited some old silver mines and walked down a cliff path to visit a deserted cove, he is having a wonderful time. The only slight disappointment is the fact that as the moon is almost at the full the stars are less bright that usual, this however is a small thing and everything else has exceeded expectations, The food is all fresh and either grown , laid, hatched or caught on or around the island., it is beautifully cooked and relatively inexpensive and he is being spoiled by the lady who runs the guest house where he is staying, he is always lucky that way.

Pa and I had bacon and eggs with mushrooms for dinner, followed by iced cream, this no preparation meal allowed my more time in the garden for which I was very thankful. Our flower garden is attracting almost as many admirers as it does bumble bees. A coach full of people actually stopped so that the passengers cold get out to have a look . There is a garden open to the public close tour home and this type of thing often happens. Fortunately they did not require any attention and I was able to continue in the vegetable garden quite undisturbed. Had I been working in the front garden it would have been a different matter, years of experience have taught me to stay well clear of the flower garden unless I want company.....at the moment I do not!

From my window as I write I can see Pa in the flower garden with our little cat , by the way she is rolling about I suspect that he has just given her a sprig of cat mint, dear Twiggy she loves the garden every bit as much as I and has spent the whole day stalking in the long orchard grass, sleeping in the sun and sitting in her tree house. She will be a sleepy little cat tonight, come to that so am I so I shall stop rambling on and take a bath. Good night every one, sleep well.

THE DAY THE CAFE AVIE RAN OUT OF CAKE!

Very early this morning I went down stairs with a coffee for Pa and while he collected himself I undertook the job of organising the freezers as the meat order was due during the course of the morning. All went well, I rearranged things so the the new and the old would not become confused,when you shop for meat every three months or so stock control in vitally important. Again all went well and as soon as Pa was dressed we had a lovely lazy breakfast interrupted only by the arrival of two large boxes of meat.

I was pleased that it had arrived early as this meant that not only would the packing away be done after breakfast leaving me plenty of time for the garden but also in meant that Pa could have his favourite oxtail stew for dinner. With breakfast over I cleared the table but before I washed up I stored the meat away in the newly cleaned freezer and was just congratulating myself that the day was going according to plan for once when there was a knock at the door. Hoping that it was the post I was just a little dismayed to find a friend whom I have not seen since before Christmas standing on the door step.

Now don't get me wrong, she is a lovely lady, a perfect pet but if she has one small fault it is that she stays, and stays no matter what. Once she is across the threshold nothing can shift her until she decides to leave. With my heart in my boots and the kitchen full of dirty dishes I showed her in and she plonked down at the table, on any other day I should have been delighted to see her but you see I had a four pound bag of gooseberries defrosting on the table waiting to be made in to jam, an oxtail stew to prepare and I desperately needed to get in to the garden as I have some plants in urgent need of attention and the greenhouse to water. Resigned I put the kettle on and as we chatted she announced that her boyfriend would be along soon, he had a call to make first but would be along in an hour or so. I was desperate.

Yesterday the Café Avie had so many visitors that I ran out of biscuits and so last night I made a couple of banana and date cakes, these are wonderfully moist and are very nice buttered. One of these went next door as soon as it left the oven and so I gave my friend a thick slice of the remaining cake and as she ate it I peeled carrots, parsnips and onions to go in to the stew.

Feeling that I was being rather rude I explained that this particular stew needs at least five hours of very slow cooking if it is to be done correctly, thankfully she did not mind at all and as she poured another cup of tea and took another slice of cake I was grateful that she was so understanding. Then the boyfriend arrived.

Another pot of tea and more cake disappeared quickly and I prayed fervently that no more guests would appear. The kitchen was a bomb site and time was going by so Pa and I did something which we have not done for years. I told him that if he wanted to got to the village he had better go now as I needed the buggy myself for an urgent visit see a sick friend. Pa took the hint well and set off on an imaginary trip to the village, actually he did go there and picked up a few bits from the hardware store whilst killing time. After he had been gone for half an hour I expressed the hope that he would soon return as I needed to pick up some flowers on the way, mercifully they took the hint and left .
Years ago when we were first married Pa and I would use this rouse to encourage inconvenient visitors to leave, it never failed then and I am glad to say that it still works,

With the kitchen still in disarray I tackled the dishes cleaned the floor and sorted out the laundry, all things which I had hope would have been finishes hours before. Then I noticed that the cake was gone, that meant more baking......bum! On the plus side she had brought with he a raspberry pie which was a nice gesture I thought and I bar of lavender soap, this however did not alter the fact that I needed to bake ...soon.

I did eventually get out in to the garden but only for an hour instead of the four of five hours I had been planning to have ...bum again! Really though I should not complain, they are lovely people to be sure, the problem is that having very little to do themselves they assume that I too have lots of leisure time to spend chatting , how I wish that this was true. Nothing daunted Pa and I ate our lovely oxtail stew and decided that tomorrow we would do all the things which we did not do today, what will happen the the chores I intended to do tomorrow I cannot say, frankly I do not care.

My son is still enjoying his holiday in spite of the fact that the boat trip he was to take this morning was cancelled due to a thick sea mist,,he is loving the peace and quiet, there is nothing like having a whole forest or a lovely little cove all to yourself.

I have decided to have an early night so if any one was entertaining the idea of paying me a visit this evening......don't!

TWENT NINE YEARS AGO TODAY

Today is my sons twenty ninth birthday,and on the day that he was born I was also twenty nine years old. When I look back on that day I still feel the rush of joy and wonder that such a marvellous creature could come into the world and I am certain that this feeling will never faded

He was born perfect with not a wrinkle, and he was born smiling. He was born in a small cottage hospital in a market town a few miles from my home he was delivered by my own G.P who insisted upon being there for the birth. Having no experience in such matters I did not realise that I had been in labour for some time as I had for over a month been experiencing what used to be called false contractions and I just assumed that these were more of the same.,but by two in the morning it was obvious that this was the real thing at last.

Driving through the dark country lanes in the middle of the night lent an air of unreality to the unfolding events and when we arrived at the hospital and I walked up the stair I felt that these things were happening to someone else, I felt almost drugged and was enveloped in a feeling of calm and peace.

I should like to say that this continued throughout the birth but soon enough the reality of my situation forced itself upon my notice manifested in the rending rearing pains which outraged my body and seared my brain. All the time Pa held my hand or bathed my face and from time to time gave me iced water to drink, he never flinched , he was a tower of strength all through the night.

Dawn came and I could see the sun rising through the windows opposite my bed and still the pains continued, I was very tired and wanted to sleep. Sister Savin, I shall never forget her, stroked my head and said “You can sleep soon, you are doing fine.” Throughout my labour and subsequent time in hospital she was wonderful, she gave me confidence, she was kind, she understood.

During the final stages of labour there were difficulties, my son, wouldn't you know it decided to try to be born shoulders first, rather like a man trying to knock down a door. Now the pain was truly dreadful and time seemed to stand still. Suddenly the unreal feeling returned and I was vaguely aware of my Doctor attempting to rectify the problem and whispered conversations. I caught the sentence.”Ten more minutes and we must send her to the General. “ I yelled out “Over my dead body.” Every one including me went back to work with a vengeance and at noon on a glorious sunny May morning I saw my son for the first time, and fell in love irrevocably.

Even the nurses said that they had never seen a more beautiful new born and my darling Sister Savin informed me that he had the distinction of being the longest baby delivered at the hospital, just my luck!.

My beautiful baby grew in to a dear little boy and them into a fine young man of whom we are justly proud. He battled with asthma all through school and he sat his G.C.S.E exams in a room by himself as his coughing and gasping was disturbing others students. In spite of his asthma he received commendations for sport and his teacher, amazed at his dedication told me that if the able bodied scholars worked only half as hard as my son the school would win every sports trophy in the county.

Thankfully the asthmas has become less of a problem although he still coughs and has trouble breathing at times, hay fever can trigger attacks but he will not allow this to stop him doing anything he wants to do.

My lovely boy hates to be praised , he blushes and becomes embarrassed when anyone praises him in any way, he is self effacing and modest to a fault.
Of course you could say that as his mother I would say all this but I promise you that I do not exaggerate how fine and special he is.
This morning we called him on Sark to wish him a happy birthday, he sounded happy and relaxed and not at all tired by his long journey yesterday.
So far he has laughed his way through life and I pray that he will continue to find life fun, I can think of no better wish on this special day.

UP BEFORE THE LARKS

Today got off to an unconscionably early start, my son and I were both wide awake at three but we both pretended to have another hour before finally getting up and having coffee at four. Neither of us felt at all like eating and so we sipped another coffee while we waited for the taxi to arrive as it soon did right on time. Goodbyes were said at the gate and then after having a look around the garden I crawled back to bed and this time I did sleep until six thirty.

Pa had an important hospital appointment this morning so I began the process of waking him, not a task for the faint hearted,endless patience, and a loud voice combined with persistence and a tough hide are required in the performance of this daily routine. With coffee and encouragement he was up and dressed in time and off we went.

After what seemed like hours in the waiting room we were eventually ushered in to see the consultant which was fine except that he had no idea why Pa was there although he spent quite a while assuring us that he was quite able to see to Pa after reading his copious notes he sent him off to the x-ray department and told us the we would need to see the senior consultant when we returned.....which was what we had been trying to tell him for a full fifteen minutes.

Clinical imaging is always busy so we waited....and waited ...and waited... and hell began to freeze over when at last the radiographer call Pa in. Almost at once the nurse from orthopaedics came to see what had happened to us “ You have been a time.” she said, and I began to feel that the staffs ability to state the obvious was rather wearing to say the least.

Back in the orthopaedics waiting room that is exactly what we did....for an absolute age and when at last we were told that the senior consultant could see us we had been sitting about for so long that my knee had seized up and I could not stand without assistance.
Today the big discussion was whether to operate or not, this in Pa's case is fraught with difficulty and danger;for apart from the need of a knee replacement he has a ruptured glands behind the knee, oedema, and a seriously compromised immune system . Any one of these things is a problem but taken all round it would make the operation dangerous.

Still worse is the fact that in order to operate he would need to be taken off the medication which prevents the arthritis from spreading as it is this which lowers his immune system. Prior to an operation eighteen months ago Pa was told to stop taking this medication for some weeks before surgery and it was during that time that the knee joint was attacked and his present problem is the direct result of that. Now I do not know about you but neither Pa or I see any point having one thong fixed it it is going to cause another problem, especially as the surgery poses such a serious risk. Than the Gods the consultant agreed and the have decided to have him fitted for a much more sophisticated leg brace which will stabilise and support the joint....something that Pa has been asking for for over a year.

We left the hospital jubilant, very relieved and absolutely worn out so I got Pa home in a taxi and then I went off to do some shopping. I was very quick but it was still almost four before I reached home again, what a day.

During the morning I received calls from my son from time to time to tell me off his progress. He caught his train from with plenty of time to spare and arrived at Weymouth in plenty of time to have a good breakfast before catching the ferry to Jersey. Luckily he is a good sailor and is never seasick so bacon sandwiches were his breakfast of choice. The ferry arrived at Jersey an hour late but still in time to catch the ferry to Sark and although this will mean the the shop will be closed and he will have to buy shower gel and toothpaste tomorrow he was happy enough. I have heard nothing more and I expect that he would want to eat and settle in to his B And B so that does not cause me any worries at all.

After such a day I am sure that he will be as tired as can be and like me will have as early a night as possible. Dinner for Pa and myself was a plate of cold meats and salad with new potatoes and asparagus covered in melted butter with a couple of pannini and lots of lovely olives, with a Danish pastry to Finnish the meal.

Now all that remains is to see Pa safely bathed and bedded down with a nice hot drink and I can collapse in to a heap and sleep. Twiggy is already missing my son and as we all disappeared for a long while this morning see is inclined at the moment to be rather clingy, poor old puss she hates it when we go out ,she really is a dear little cat. Tonight she shall have fresh cat mint from the garden and her favourite cat treats before bed, and if she does not spend the night in my sons room I shall eat my hat!

My son just called to tell us that he has landed safely on Sark, his guest house is lovely and his room is large and pleasant, most important of all the bed is soft. His luggage is being sent up in a pony cart and then he is going to eat. He sounds so happy and excited, and that makes my happy to.

"CONFUED, YOU WILL BE"

I have had one hell of a day, I do not know where to begin, it has been like swimming in a bath of treacle, a lot of hard work to get no where! The only way in which I can account for the mistakes and mishaps is either everyone I know has developed cloth ears of I have spent the entire day speaking in a foreign language. Conversations have been rather like the joke about the two old ladies, you know the one.
First old lady. “This steak's chewy.” Second old lady. “No its not its Wednesday.”
There have been mistakes over who is paying what bill this month, guess what I lost, and all because Pa got confused about the meat order and my son paid another bill with my dosh instead of Pa's. Were I a cynical soul I might begin to think that the two of them were in cahoots if it were not for the fact that neither of them would be capable of such a Machiavellian stroke based upon today's performance.

Although I moved heaven and earth to avoid having to go to the shops today I was obliged to trundle off to buy some peppers and honey, this was also caused by the inattention of the males of this family. Perhaps if the closed their mouths,opened their ears and listened we should not have this problem. Do please excuse the tantrum, as I said it has been one hell of a day.

Pa has been in one ofhis pernickitty, nit picketty moods and all day long he had me on the hop. Could I rig up some thing to stop the squirrels from raiding the bird feeders, he is becoming obsessive on this matter, I on the other hand do not give a tinkers cuss if the squirrels nick off with the lot if I can only get enough time to water the green house.

“Has the washing in the machine been rinsed?” “Yes, three ****** times.”
“What time is our son leaving in the morning?” “Ten past five dear.” FOR THE TWENTIETH TIME.........AAAAAAAAAAAAAAARG!

Even if everything had been fine I have had so much on my mind today, the packing to finnish, the butchers order to put in this afternoon. Bills to pay, transport to hospital to arrange, tomorrows shopping ;list.......the list is endless. What I did not need was to have my ears and my poor addled brain drilled with constant questions .aaaaaaaaaaaarg!

We did have a lovely evening meal of sticky chicken with wraps and salad followed with iced cream, that was the high spot of the whole day.

Now at last the case is packed, my son is bathed and about to turn in as he has to get up early, as indeed do I . I hope he sleeps well as he will be travelling for over twelve hours tomorrow.
I shall be glad when tomorrow is over,once my son leaves I must get Pa ready for an important medical appointment. Were are hoping to get a decision about his knee replacement surgery. Poor old Pa, there are so many complications that it is a tough call.

After that there is shopping to do ,I just hope I can find the stamina to get through that lot.

In spite of my ill tempered tirade I am going to miss my son very much,no matter how bad things get he can always be relied upon to see the funny side and he is a source of great comfort to me in times of stress. One thing is certain, he really needs this holiday in a quiet spot with only himself to think of. He gives his time , energy and love unstintingly always, he is kind, loyal and honourable he is in short a very rare young man.

THE PEASANT HAS REVOLTED....... AGAIN.....

I spent a large part of the morning ironing and packing my sons clothes for his forthcoming holiday. The morning was fair and through the open window as I toiled away the delectable sights and sounds of the summer garden tormented and enticed . Although I am happy to look after my family in every way I must admit that there are times when I feel like a Victorian Cook General or a maid of all work. There are, about the house many jobs which it seems always to be taken for granted are no ones business but mine.

Obviously the ironing is one of these, cleaning the bathroom, changing the towels, organising the laundry, the list is endless. There seems to be a belief that there is a magic fairy who, when no one is looking replenishes the soap dispenser, cleans the loo, and ensures that we do not run out of vital supplies. There have been numerous occasions when I have neglected to purchase some item or another and I am asked why I have not ordered this or that accompanied by the remark “We ran out two days ago.” .or “I used the last of it last week.” This is calculated to irritate me exceedingly as everyone has assess to a running list of items and should be able to add anything we need. Items of a personal nature such as a favourite deodorant or tooth paste do get added, it is the general items such as shoe polish, tomato ketchup or salad cream which often get over looked. Then of course it's “ There,s no Radox, or shaving foam, razor blades or fruity sauce.”. This accompanied by accusing looks at best and pained expressions at worst.

The belief that I am some kind of all seeing oracle who can penetrate cupboards by the power of though and also read the minds of others with regard to their needs may seem touching to some but this blind faith in my ability to know all is a total pain and leads to me having to hare off to the supermarket all to often.

The tenor of today's blog may well have a good deal to do with the fact that I have today spent several hours ironing the togs which my darling son is taking with him on holiday. This ironing including the re-ironing of a large number of already cleaned and ironed garments which have found their way off the hangers and on to the wardrobe floor..*!!!!***, as if having to iron the damned things once is not enough! Moan over.

Other than the above the day has been good, I got a little lie in this morning which was nice and our breakfast of crumpets and muffins with honey was lovely too. Dinner was a quick meal of gammon steaks with eggs chips and a hot tomato sauce and in between the two meals and the ironing I managed to water the vegetable garden, not much but better than nothing.

All the chores are done and we are watching Euro Vision, annual farce, but my son loves it , I think it is a load of unadulterated trash and I detest Graham Norton so I shall have a tough night. What saves the whole thing is my sons hysterically funny commentary throughout the whole thing and the inevitable scoring at the end, on which bets are laid. Last year I laughed so much that I hurt my ribs.

Sunday tomorrow which means no blasted postmen, no U.P.S. no Fed. X no City Link thank The Lord. This morning we had one of each before ten each of which hammered on the door so loudly it felt like a police raid. Really I should hate to have a hangover, their attentions could be fatal.

I can think of nothing more to write and so now I must post this blog and start paying attention to the entertainment of the evening....Ho Hum.....

FRIDAY THE THIRTEENTH HAS STRUCH.....AN APPOLOGY

Heaven knows how it happened but when I logged on to publish today's blog I discovered that the blogs for the eleventh and the twelfth of this month have completely disappeared. My clever son says that he cannot work out how it happened and I am clueless.

My profound apologies for the technical hitch. I have published the missing blogs again so that including this message Friday the thirteenths blog is fourth on the list.

OUT AND ABOUT

We had a bit of a kerfuffle this morning which caused me to have to rethink the rest of the day. In a fit of absent mindedness last night I quite forgot that I had promised my son sausage sandwiched for breakfast and a full English breakfast for Pa. I make no excuses I just forgot, so that when my son remarked as he brought me a coffee this morning how much he was looking forward to the rare delicacy I was thrown in to a flat spin.

It had been my intention to clean the bathroom early this morning before breakfast, that idea was scouted at once and a mad rummage about in the freezer accompanied by much cursing then took place. I located twelve thick pork sausages frozen solid and some equally rigid bacon. I never thought to say this but thank the Gods for that microwave. Some time later with the breakfast sausages and bacon in a fit condition to cook I began to get the breakfast.

Pa was as yet not up and I was about to begin this time consuming ritual when my telephone rang, it was the daughter of one of my friends who wanted to come and see me.....right away! In vain I attempted to put her off till later,no she must come NOW !..****!! I was up to my ears with breakfast and Pa when she arrived fifteen minutes later and I basely sent my sin to answer the door hoping that she would leave leave whatever it was and go. She is a lovely girl of whom I am very fond but she could talk the legs of a centipede. My son sought me out with the news that she was now sitting on the bench outside the front door and would wait.....however long it took!

Defeated I bit the bullet and went out to see her, and now I felt terrible because she had made me a box of the most beautiful cupcakes wonderfully decorated for my birthday. You see I had jokingly said in conversation with her mother that I had made four birthday cakes for other people in the past week but had to make do with an iced cream for my birthday tea. Oh if the floor could have opened up and swallowed me I should have been very glad indeed.
Of course I was loud in my praise of the truly lovely cakes but as Pa was still mooching about in the living room in his underwear I was in no position to invite the poor girl in, add to this the pong of burning bacon and my distraction was complete. A sudden loud crash from the living room was the final straw and I made my excuses and dived inside feeling even more guilty. Thankfully it was only Pa's walking aid crashing into the fireplace but I am now going to have a lot of explaining to do when next I see the young lady.

There was no time at all for the garden today as I still had the bathroom to do when we returned from the shops,I did have enough time for a quick walk around my estate as it were and I must say that the flower garden is looking better this year than ever. People keep on stopping by to tell us how lovely it is, it is odd really because it is not the sort of garden that I would expect most people to like. The planting breaks all the rules, the colour scheme is , to put it politely original and although the planting does overall effect does owe something to Gertrude Jekyll it owes a good deal more to Salvador Dali in many ways Different people seem to see different things in it and it is nice when we get compliments . .

My son and I decided that we fancied pizza for dinner so armed with ham, mozzarella and tomatoes I embellished a couple of Tescos finest to bring them up to snuff, I am not a fan of pizza but my son loves it, I often make them from scratch but today there was not the time.;in the end they were really nice and we finished of with my special birthday cakes.....lovely.

For a day that began with so little promise it turned in to one of the nicest days I have ever had, I am lucky to know so many kind people, they make life so much happier and I thank heaven for them.

Oh yes, the cat Twiggy did not spend last night on my bed, instead she spent the whole night chasing a very large and very angry chaffer which she had brought in from the garden. She and it made such a racket that we were obliged to catch the poor thing in the early hours and put it out in to the garden. Poor old puss then spent the rest of the night searching for her confiscated quarry, as a consequence she has been extremely sleepy today , silly old puss!

FEELING GROOVY

I must say that I am enjoying the feeling of being on holiday even though I still seem to have lots to do. For this week at least it does not matter when we get up, or when we eat, well qt least until Saturday.
My little cat spent a very happy night asleep on my bed and as I was rather restless I had plenty of time to stroke her pretty fur which of course she loved. She got up at six but I lazed about until eight before going downstairs to make the days bread, after which we had a breakfast of poached eggs on toast and the day began in earnest.

I had a loaf to deliver to a friend who works at the garden centre and this gave me the perfect excuse to have a browse among the plants to see what was new. I was looking for some red Mimulus but ended up buying a plant called Fox and cubs, it is really a weed but it is so pretty that I could not resist. Truth to tell I have quite a few weeds in my garden and although most of them are planted deliberately there are a few which I could well do without. I have been fighting a running battle with bindweed for years and I must say that the flowers are so lovely that I leave them alone if I can. The trouble is that they strangle the life out of anything the come in contact with inn an attempt to climb as high as possible. There is also the speedwell or mile a minute as it is commonly called, it certainly lives up to its name. Those pretty blue flowered plant is lethal if it gets amongst young seedling as it chokes them by growing much faster that they do and if you try to pull it out you drags the young seedlings out with it.

The leeks were ready to go out in to the garden and today I managed to plant out more than half of my stock. The ones I put out today will with luck see us through the winter months for soups and stews. Florence fennel, a favourite of mine went out today also along with some Russian Tarragon.
Florence fennel is green and has an edible bulb which is very good to eat, The more ornamental bronze fennel is grown in the flower garden, I do occasionally cook with it but I much prefer to let it flower, its wonderful frondy leaf , rich red bronze and its umbrella shaped flowers are a real feature of our garden in the summer time. I also grow the beautiful morning glory about which the less said the better.

We had a huge joint of beef left over from the Christmas neat order and as I needed to use it up we decided to have it for dinner tonight Medieval style served on trenchers of day old bread with all the lovely juices running through. It seem a rather decadent way of eating but none of us wanted the usual trimmings and so I brought in a salad from the garden and we had a feast. There is quite a lot of meat left and this will be eaten cold on Friday with some cheeses and bread and a pork pie. Pa loves roast beef and tonight he ate lots, keeping his weight up is such a problem but at least tonight he ate enough, he even had some fruit and fresh cream for afters so that should help too.

The pace of the days is slower and we are all beginning to relax, it is not a question of not having anything to do but one of not having to do anything that makes such a difference.

During my gardening activities I managed to get lots of twigs and bits of grass in my hair so I shall have to wash it before I go to bed, I hate it when my hair is not clean, and once that is done I shall let the cat find me, the perfect end to the day.

TWAS ON A FRIDAY MORNING OH.

Twas on a Friday the thirteenth morning oh, to be precise. I have to tell you that rather perversely I have always felt Friday the thirteenth to be lucky for me. For example it was on Friday the thirteenth 1969 that Pa first asked me for a date................mmmmmmmm? On the other hand my son is convinced that bad luck will befall on this fateful day and I must say that some frankly appealing bad luck has happened to him on that date from time to time.

Superstition is a very personal thing, for example when ever I see a magpie I always say “Good morning sir.” or Good afternoon, or evening depending upon the time of day. This has been going on since I was a child and I cannot remember a time when I did not do this ritual which was prevail ant amongst the children in my home village.

If I bump one elbow I always bump the other for luck, this was pasted to me by my mother and her mother before her and it would be unthinkable not to do it now. I consider these odd little foibles harmless enough but let my tell you a story, a true one which happened to me almost forty years ago.

I was at Drama school and a party of us were to be taken to London's Phoenix Theatre to see a performance of The Canterbury Tales. Since the show was in the evening and we had arrived in the late morning we were told to spend the day as we pleased and met outside the theatre half and hour before curtain up. Three of us decided to go to Oxford Street to see the shops......er I mean sights and arrived there after a degree of trouble on the underground when for some reason I cannot remember we ended up at Cock fosters. No sooner had we arrived that an ambulance in full cry , sirens and flashing lights sped past us, my friend turned round three time and said “Hold your collar and don't swallow until you see a dog.”
She became very agitated so we all did the turning round bit and gripped our collars for dear life.
Now I do not know if you have ever tried to find a dog in this part of London but we spent hours handing an to our collars and occasionally spitting as we could not swallow and damned uncomfortable it was. I suggested Harrods which I had heard had a pet shop ,but another pointed out that we would soon be thrown out if we went about that famous store spitting every few minutes,. The next crackpot idea was Buckingham Palace on the chance of spotting one of the resident corgi,s until I remembered that her Majesty always walks her dogs in the back garden!

I was beginning to think that bad luck would be preferable to continuing in our present predicament when a taxi stopped beside us and a lady alighted.....with two dogs. We swallowed in unison, and for the first time in over an hour. This all goes to prove how nonsensical superstition is and yet if I wear to spot a magpie right now you know what I would do?

This afternoon my son and I vacuum and steamed the floors right through the house, a poxy job at the best of times but on a humid day like today almost unbearable. Before I became disabled I used to hoover the downstairs rooms daily, not any more, now I am lucky if the hoovering gets done twice a week and so of course the job takes longer as the floors are dirtier. Both of us were very sweaty and very tired by the time the job was done., and for a time the air around us was blue with purple edges.

Dinner tonight was our usual cold meats and cheeses with the wholemeal bread made early this morning before breakfast. The grocery delivery arrived on time, intact and for once complete which Is nothing short of amazing and I cannot remember when this remarkable event occurred last.

This morning my left hip joint popped again , this happens so often these days that IO refuse to attribute it to the date and day. Of course as I write there are still several hours of Friday the thirteenth left so it will not do to be too complacent just in case........what am I saying.... lets face it I am no better than my superstitious son!

MORE ALARMS AND EXCURSIONS

We had a bit of a kerfuffle this morning which caused me to have to rethink the rest of the day. In a fit of absent mindedness last night I quite forgot that I had promised my son sausage sandwiched for breakfast and a full English breakfast for Pa. I make no excuses I just forgot, so that when my son remarked as he brought me a coffee this morning how much he was looking forward to this rare delicacy I was thrown in to a flat spin.

It had been my intention to clean the bathroom early this morning before breakfast, that idea was scouted at once and a mad rummage about in the freezer accompanied by much cursing then took place. I located twelve thick pork sausages frozen solid and some equally rigid bacon. I never thought to say this but thank the Gods for that microwave. Some time later with the breakfast sausages and bacon in a fit condition to cook I began to get the breakfast.

Pa was as yet not up and I was about to begin this time consuming ritual when my telephone rang, it was the daughter of one of my friends who wanted to come and see me.....right away! In vain I attempted to put her off till later,no she must come NOW !..****!! I was up to my ears with breakfast and Pa when she arrived fifteen minutes later and I basely sent my son to answer the door hoping that she would leave leave whatever it was and go. She is a lovely girl of whom I am very fond but she could talk the legs of a centipede. My son sought me out with the news that she was now sitting on the bench outside the front door and would wait.....however long it took!

Defeated I bit the bullet and went out to see her, and now I felt terrible because she had made me a box of the most beautiful cupcakes wonderfully decorated for my birthday. You see I had jokingly said in conversation with her mother that I had made four birthday cakes for other people in the past week but had to make do with an iced cream for my birthday tea. Oh if the floor could have opened up and swallowed me I should have been very glad indeed.
Of course I was loud in my praise of the truly lovely cakes but as Pa was still mooching about in the living room in his underwear I was in no position to invite the poor girl in, add to this the pong of burning bacon and my distraction was complete. A sudden loud crash from the living room was the final straw and I made my excuses and dived inside feeling even more guilty. Thankfully it was only Pa's walking aid crashing into the fireplace but I am now going to have a lot of explaining to do when next I see the young lady.

As soon as breakfast was over my son and I set off for the shops to buy a few last minute items for his holiday and I managed to find a t shirt he liked much to my amazement.

There was no time at all for the garden today as I still had the bathroom to do when we returned from the shops,I did have enough time for a quick walk around my estate as it were and I must say that the flower garden is looking better this year than ever. People keep on stopping by to tell us how lovely it is, it is odd really because it is not the sort of garden that I would expect most people to like. The planting breaks all the rules, the colour scheme is , to put it politely original and although the overall effect does owe something to Gertrude Jekyll it owes a good deal more to Salvador Dali in many ways Different people seem to see different things in it and it is nice when we get compliments . .

My son and I decided that we fancied pizza for dinner so armed with ham, mozzarella and tomatoes I embellished a couple of Tescos finest to bring them up to snuff, I am not a fan of pizza but my son loves it, I often make them from scratch but today there was not the time.;in the end they were really nice and we finished of with my special birthday cakes.....lovely.

For a day that began with so little promise it turned in to one of the nicest days I have ever had, I am lucky to know so many kind people, they make life so much happier and I thank heaven for them.

Oh yes, the cat Twiggy did not spend last night on my bed, instead she spent the whole night chasing a very large and very angry chaffer which she had brought in from the garden. She and it made such a racket that we were obliged to catch the poor thing in the early hours and put it out in to the garden. Poor old puss then spent the rest of the night searching for her confiscated quarry, as a consequence she has been extremely sleepy today , silly old puss!