AFTERMATH

Yesterday,s hectic pace took it's toll and this morning I overslept.....really overslept. My son and I were to have got up early ,grab a slice of toast and the hit the shops running in order to be back home for brunch at about eleven. It was past nine before I stirred and I was the first to wake.


In blind panic I put the kettle on for coffee resurrected my son then headed for the bathroom but was arrested in mid flight by a pounding on the door. I made a dash for the stairs....my son made a dash for the stairs and there was an unseemly altercation as the frantic pounding continued. My son,dressed in nothing but a pair of snazzy boxer shorts opened the door as I ,dressed in a long nighty and feeling overdressed arrived a few moments later.

We had been expecting a delivery of fresh meat from our butcher in Yorkshire....but not until lunch time. Well here it was and the deliveryman,who is a sweetie and always brings it in for us pushed past my son ;with a srtaiter face than I could muster and deposited the large insulated box in the kitchen. We exchanged news and I told him that I would see him again quite soon as the beef and game were coming separately

.He has been delivering our meat for so long that we have become friends,I gave him a jar of our Christmas chutney and told him that the next time he came the damson jam would be ready. My son reappeared fully clothed and our visitor left soon after.

Before I could leave for the shop I now had to unpack the meat and bag it ready for the freezers,most of it does come ready packed but the bulk order of chicken breasts ,minced steak and chops has to be re-packaged in smaller quantities.

On one memorable occasion the meat arrived while I was out and was put away by Pa who then forgot to mention that it had arrived. Late in the afternoon when I said I would call to see why it had not arrived he remembered to tell me,b which time I was obliged to take a hammer and chisel to two dozen chicken breast before I could bag them as they were almost frozen solid........as was ten pounds of steak mince,five pounds of pork mince and a five pound bag of steak and kidney. Did I curse? You bet your life I did!

At last we were off and I have to tell you that we whizzed around the supermarket like a dose of salts and headed for home famished.

After hurriedly stuffing the groceries and dry goods in to cupboards I made a mountain of hot bacon rolls and Lord did we stuff? The remainder of the afternoon was spent doing all the chores neglected yesterday as I did battle over the churchyard, it was well that we had eaten a full brunch as dinner was still no where to be seen at seven.

I quickly put together a baked pasta dish using the left over ham from Thursday,leeks, and cream cheese,this hot dish topped with buttered breadcrumbs proved to be a winner served with salad.

I staggered up to my room and collapsed in a heap, from all directions the exhausted groans of the boys reached my ears so I made coffee upstairs for all before taking a well earned shower.

The trouble is that I am still behind, with the chores,the bread, which I should have made on Thursday will; have to be made tomorrow as will the weeks cookie supply(Pa's biscuit tin is empty,there’s the ironing to do, a plant list of waterside wild flowers is urgently needed by one of our members............Oh bugger it!!!!! As my old Granny used to say “What don't get done will just have to get left.” I associate myself with that sentiment 100%.

A MEETING,AN ARGUMENT AND AN AMAZING PIECE OF LUCK

A meeting was scheduled at the crack of dawn this morning at our conservation site with the man from Laings who was responsible for the recent destruction of a grove of young and very valuable trees on a conservation area. He trees had been paid for by public subscription and one,a black poplar could prove to be irreplaceable


I have last crossed swords with this chap some ten years ago when he was employed by our local authority and was not at all surprised to hear him peddling the same trashy arguments has formerly.

There was one hell of a row as we put our case and he trotted out the usual pathetic excuses. But he finally agreed to replace the damaged trees and to leave the conservation area alone in the future.

He claimed a breakdown in communications but happen to know that they deliberately cleared the area,with out consultation in order to let the ground out to tennants. When we took over this piece of ground it was above head hight in bramble and nothing had been grown there for over thirty years. The moment our group cleared it and planted the young trees they saw a way to make money out of it,strimmed down the trees and attempted to take it back again.

I shall not trouble you with the lame excuses we were obliged to listen to while we stood about getting rained on , it is enough that in the end he gave up the fight and the land is now ours again.

I was about to leave when a large truck appeared in the lane containing two men,a huge mower and a pair of brush cutters, they were heading for the church yard. As you will know if you have read my blog before their was a battle to save this sensitive site from the hack and slash methods of Laings and in the end our Local Authority drew up a plan I conjunction with our group to stop their activities and prevent any further damage.

Suddenly and without consultation they decided to return to their fortnightly strimming of the pathways. Thank the Gods we were on site to stop them. I told them that if they persisted I should park my mobility scooter on the pathway and they would have to strim around me. That cooled them down quickly and they decided not to strim today after all.

During the afternoon a flurry of e mails were fired off and I hope that this time all will be well. It was, it seems another breakdown in communications, it ssems that they have forgotten all about the conservation programme.

One thing is certain,if one blade of grass is touched I shall personally see to it that the ass of the ass responsible gets kicked all around the parish. Yea,verily and forsooth!

IT'S NICE TO BE WANTED

Some months ago my son joined our conservation group and his input has proved invaluable,so much so that he has been head hunted by a newly formed group Chairman!


Throughout the week he has been inundated with email and telephone calls. I too have been approached and asked to intercede in the matter.

My son who recently wrote their constitution (and now wonders if any one has read it thoroughly has said that their needs to be an election for all positions as laid down in the constitution but he will fill in as Chairman until such time as this has been carried out.

A good deal is at stake for the new group as there are grants for be applied for and a new initiative concerning river pollution in our area and they need to be in from the beginning if they are to influence matters .
What they are after is in fact his expertise in dealing with recalcitrant Councillors and his contacts within the legal proffession , his long experience of committee work combined with his background in politics ,all of of which have been invaluable to our own group.

He brings a certain gravitas to meetings and when ,as we frequently do we deal with members of parliament, London Assembly Members and celebrities he has exactly the right approach.

Of course I would say all this as I am his adoringly fond Mama,the point is that every one is saying this and although my modest boy has been rather taken aback by such praise I of course am thrilled to know how much he is valued by our village community,and beyond.

What ever happens he will do his very best because it is not in his nature to do less. His experience,his dedication and his unfailing good humour will stand the new group in good stead as they join other groups in the fight.

Incidentally I manage to photograph one of the injured squirrels in Silver Hall Park, one of the many victims of the Councils hack and slash policy. It's tail was amputated by a strimmer, not so lucky was the poor little squirrel whose hind leg was strimmed off on the same day. It is these kind of atrocities that the new “Friends of Silver Hall” will be able to prevent.

In any event I am very proud of my clever,popular son,and delighted that he shares my own commitment to our environment.

Thank the Gods he has just cut off his eighteen inch pony tail and shaved of his enormous beard. If you are seriously interested in environmental matters it does not pay to look like a Greenie!

RECIPE REQUESTS

I have had a couple of requests for cookie recipes and as nothing of consequence has happened today now seems a good time to post them.


WHOLEMEAL SHORTBREAD

8oz butter

4 oz caster sugar

4 oz cornflour

8oz plain wholemeal flour

half a teaspoon of vanilla essence

1 tablespoon caster sugar


Grease a Swiss role tin and set the oven temperature to 325oF

Cream the butter and icing sugar together until pale and fluffy, then add the essence and mix for a few more minutes.

Sieve together the wholemeal flour and the cornflour then add to the butter cream and mix well until a stiff dough is formed.

Turn the mixture in to the Swiss roll tin and spread to cover the whole tin. Push into the corners and flatten with your fingers so that the mixture is firm and not crumbly.

Bake for 40 minutes until then remove from the oven and using a sharp knife cut in to 16 fingers. Dust with caster sugar and leave to cool.

These shortbreads are delicious eaten warm and at our house at least a quarter of each batch gets eaten before it finds its way to the cookie jar!

The next recipe is in response to a request for a chewy biscuit, the following is an American recipe because in my opinion they make the best chocolate chip cookies in the world,chewy like these or crisp like ones you buy in New York.

Chewy Chocolate Chip Cookies

4 egg whites

12 oz icing sugar

3 oz cocoa powder

2 tablespoons of plain flour

1 teaspoon of powdered instant coffee

1 tablespoon of water

4 oz walnuts chopped very finely

2oz dark chocolate chips

Pre heat the oven to 180oC. Grease baking sheets and line with non stick parchment. Beat the egg whites until they are frothy. Add the sugar,cocoa,flour,coffee and water to the bowl and beat slowly at first and then at a higher speed for a few minutes until the mixture thickens. Fold in the walnuts and the chocolate chips.

Place tablespoons of the mixture on to the prepared baking sheet leaving 1 inch space between each spoon full. Bake for 15 minutes. The top will be firm and cracked but the inside still soft. Lift off each cookie carefully and cool them on a wire rack.

This amount of mix makes about a dozen and a half cookies.

I hope you enjoy making them .Love Avie x

THE CASE OF THE MISSING FERRET

                                          ONE OF TOM'S TALL TALES

My father was a renown practical joker,he also had the remarkable ability of making people believe the tallest tales and accept them as truth,a lethal combination. No matter how many jokes he pulled everyone fell for it every time,on this occasion the joke was on me.


Every night my father would nip off to our local pub for a pint and as I was often there before him I always left him a drink behind the bar.

It was Saturday night and the place was packed ,there were quite a few strangers in the place as it was a well dressing weekend and this festival brought in folks from far and wide.

I arrived and fought my way to the bar and was most surprised to find my father was about to leave,even more amazing was his refusal when I offered to by him a drink;he seemed in an almighty hurry to leave so we said our goodbyes and I returned to the bar.

Looking around as I waited to be served I noticed that a few people were acting strangely, as if they had lost something,and several of the ladies seemed agitated . Before I had time to make my order the landlord leaned across the bar and said in a low voice”I've seen it.” I was baffled and replied”Seen what?” I had no idea what he was talking about.
“Didn’t he tell you just now?” The landlord asked. “Tell me what?” I replied in desperation.

Then it all came out in a rush. Apparently my father had entered the pub and ordered a drink as usual and then after afew moments of frantic searching  for something he told the landlord that he had lost his ferret! He further explained that as my father was in a hurry he has promised that I would catch it and take it home. Great!!!!!! There was just one small problem....my father did not have a ferret to lose!!

Insisting that he had seen it hiding behind the piano I was taken thence and was obliged to watch as two burly men wheeled it out while it was being played by some old timer,who continued the massacre “Danny boy” regardless of the mayhem around him . The backing was torn and they removed the remainder so that I could have a look. I looked. After all how could I tell them at this late stage that there was no ferret?

Screams from the lounge told us that the ferret had been sighted again and on entering the room It was plain that panic had set in as all the ladies and quite a few of the men were standing on their seats and refusing to get down until the beast was caught, I searched most diligently,and found...... nothing.

Hunting ferrets is thirsty work and just as I had managed to get my hands on a pint of Guinness an ear splitting scream alerted me to more trouble and the landlady, who had gone to hide upstairs until the ferret was caught appeared in the bar insisting that the “Little bugger” was hiding upstairs in her airing cupboard.

Now I spied my chance to extricate my self from this mess and I bravely marched upstairs warning every one to leave the stairs door shut. I would, I told them catch the ferret and then take it out of the back door to the safety of my car where it would cause no further trouble.

Word soon got around that the beast was no longer at large in the bar or lounge and folks settled down, the silence was deafening as they listened with baited breath for sounds of big game hunting from upstairs. I went in to the airing cupboard and banged about, cursed a little in a loud voice and then with a cry of triumph I stuffed a pair of woolly socks up my shirt and headed for the back door.

No one came out to look at the captured critter “Thanks be to God” and I made it back to the bar unmolested where I was hailed as a heroine!

Everyone wanted to buy me a drink for catching the bogus ferret and I felt like a fraud whenever I accepted one. It turned out to be a long night and the next day my head hummed like a swarm of bees.

My father appeared at breakfast with a grin a mile wide and I swore a dreadful vengeance on him for obliging me to spend hours searching for a non existent ferret.

What still amazes me to this day is how many people said they had seen the blasted thing, the power of suggestion is great indeed! And the revenge....that's for another time.

ONLY WORDS

If there is one thing I find annoying it is the gradual decrease in the correct use of English which has for some time been creeping in to the B.B.C. And while I am certain that I am guilty of transgressions of my own I do feel that presenters of serious programmes such as the news ought to set a standard in the correct use of language.


Of course I am not referring to the dreadful clipped,received pronunciation of the fifties and early sixties,but, may we at least use the correct words in the correct places.

For instance,one of the male Breakfast News presenters has a habit of saying”I 'm sat here” when he should say”I am sitting here”. I'm sat here sounds more like Nellie Pledge in Nearest and Dearest than a serious news programme.

This morning we were informed that Wayne Rooney would be unable to play for the next month or so due to ,and I quote”a nasty gash on his leg.” This sounds far more like a”please excuse my son from sport” sick note than a news announcement. I suppose that we should be grateful that Mr Rooney did not have a “stummercake” as well!

All this ,might seem like nit picking yet with all the text speak and computer speak there really should be a place for the correct use of the most wonderful language in the world. While browsing on you tube last night I watched an interesting video clip and decided to make a comment. After attempting to translate the remarks of other viewers I refrained from doing so on the grounds that the recipient would probably not understand a word I wrote!

Punctuation and grammar seem to be obsolete in these times and indeed my own recollection of the correct usage has become hazy over time. I recently heard an English teacher commenting upon the recent exam results who insisted that it was a waste of time to teach grammar in school today,since anything I have to say in answer to that ridiculous remark would be extremely rude I shall refrain from comment.

Totally inexplicable to me is the tendency to prefix every thing with the word SO. “You,re SO Money Super Market” for example,or as a female colleague of Nellie Pledge said recently “it was SO fun.” Did she mean that it was so much fun? Perhaps she meant that it was, So funny? Who can say? To speak in such a way makes no sense.

“I'm so hungry.” or !I so want to pee.”is understandable but I am So sorry to say that this latest stupid trend is driving me SO NUTS! How stupid is that? How cool is that? How fun is that?

How ridiculous it is to use a question every time you speak,and yet this habit too has drifted down to the news room,how pathetic is that? They are so silly geese!

STORM

Quite out of the blue this afternoon we were visited by a terrific thunder storm. I had risen rather later than usual and after bread making and breakfast I busied myself with the baking of a batch of wholemeal shortbread. Pa ,who does not often express a preference asked this morning most particularly for this version of and old favourite and so of course I was happy to oblige.


Pa had just popped out to the pharmacy when the rain began,gentle at first ,but by the time he returned it was raining in good earnest and the first faint rumblings had begun. Darkness fell and we put on the lights and made coffee which we drank in the kitchen with the wonderful smell of shortbread wafting from the oven.

Lightning flashes increased both in number and intensity and we counted the seconds between the flash and the bang until at last the storm was directly overhead and the brilliant blue bursts of electricity and the deep rending peals of thunder came together. By this time the rain was torrential,running down the garden path and through the small gate at the side of the house like a stream,the yard at the rear of the house began to fill with water too!

We drank another coffee and ate some warm short bread, Pa was waiting for a lull in the rain in order to feed the garden birds and I had intended to take a short trip to the garden centre. I decided to label some pickle jars while I waited, Pa leafed through an old recipe book and several small birds decided to come in out of the rain.

I always leave the back door open when I cook as our kitchen gets rather hot, in hopped a couple of young robins and an adult, there were a few crumbs on the floor and they made the most of their chance hopping around the kitchen to find them.

Once the thunder had passed the rain continued,a littler more gently.
By the time I set about preparing our evening meal the storm was past,my son, having slept little throughout the storm appeared looking frowsty and sleepy, He soon cheered up when presented with a meal of bacon eggs,cheese oatcakes,mushrooms and tomatoes, all cooked on the griddle..lovely.

Shortly after dinner the storm began again as violent and every bit as wet as before,much to Twiggy's disgust,my son who will be very wet by the time he reaches the station is equally dispirited.

Perhaps the storm will cool things down a little as we have been finding things rather too sticky for our liking,at least I am looking forward to a cooler night and a little more sleep than usual.

I do love a good thunder storm.

HOSPITAL NEWS

Today's trip to hospital was very mush a case of “Do you want the good news first or the bad news.” I have had problems with my kidneys for long time as a result of which both kidneys are damaged,the recent problem has been the onset of kidney stones and the infections they have caused.


Kidney stones can be extremely painful and during the past couple of years I have had recurring bouts of this nasty affliction, due to a series of administrative screw ups the result of an ultra sound examination and an M.R.I were lost. Last November I was admitted to hospital as an emergency with a severe infection and an stone which had become lodged in the urethra.

Soon after this more scans were doe and I was assured that I should see a consultant early in the new Year....due to a number of administrative screw ups the appointment never arrived and it has taken until today to finally have the follow up appointment which I should have received last May!

Well, the good news is that in spite of everything there has been no significant further damage to the kidneys, and this really is good news since one kidney not functioning and the other is damaged. Today I saw the x rays and scan,it came as a shock to see how odd both kidneys looked, they were pitted here and there and lumpy,both were a very odd shape indeed.

That was the good news, the bad news is that as the remaining stones are ,at the moment causing no trouble my consultant thinks it would not be wise to try to remove them by any means and risk causing more damage. While I am happy to avoid the painful treatment and the endless treks to Charring Criss to receive it it dose mean that at any time and without warning the dreadful pain will return......the only question is when?

Unsettling as this problem is another piece of news I received at the hospital worried me even more and that is the Governments plan to close our A&E. We had been told previously that our hospital was safe and that Ealing would be the one to close and while I am convinced that both should remain open I would obviously prefer the one closest to my home (just a few hundred yards) to remain open.

Naturally I signed the forms and also took a bunch of leaflets for our neighbours who also believe our hospital to be safe.
An early start and three hours at hospital took its toll and I confess to being absolutly shattered, my son ,like the good sort he is ordered take away for us all as by dinner time I could barely stand.

One thing my consultant stressed was the need to go directly to hospital should I have any further problems,another infection would be dangerous . Thank the Gods that we now have our stair lift ,wet room and down stair loo. Last November I was afraid to leave Pa alone and so I attempted to stick it out until my sons week of nights was over , I cannot afford to do this again,and thanks to the new living aids it should not be necessary.

Twiggy crossed swords with an enormous toad today.....the toad won!

SEASONALLY STUPID

Last night I noticed that the lidded water jug which I use at night had developed a leak,this explained the damp patches and the soggy coasters which I had thought were the product of my own clumsiness. Breakfast over I betook myself to buy a replacement from either Tesco or our local Homebase. Thick fur throws lined the shelves along with other unseasonable items. No picnic jugs.


Throughout this dreary washout of a summer the shops have been filled with floaty chiffon beach wear,strappy sandals.summer dresses and skimpy tops have vied for our attention with straw hats and flip flops.

Tesco was ,even last week heaving with barbecue equipment cool bags,garden furniture and picnic jugs. Not any more,at the first sign of descent weather the sandal have been replaced by fur lined boots,where once were skimpy tops thick woollen shawls and ponchos are displayed along with thick winter coats. God damn it even woolly scarves,hats and mittens were in evidence today. While the shoppers sweltered staff everywhere were stuffing the shelves with “winter warmers”!

Did you notice too that the “Back to school” displays were disgustingly early, the poor little blighter’s still had a month of the summer term left to do while every where school uniforms,stationary and school bags were flaunted about. It's ludicrous.



Can you believe it, hot water bottles with knitted or fleecy covers,in the middle of a heatwave?



My local garden centre is full of the type of bulb that will not need to be planted out until October,this is , am told in order that the bulb displays shall not clash with the Christmas decorations which go on display in October! Why is everyone in such a hurry.



At home base a kind young man informed me that august was not the time for buying picnic jugs or such like, he was quite correct,if memory serves these items entered the shop shortly after Valentines day. Who the hell goes on a picnic in February?

What’s the betting that the Halloween displays go up on the week those poor harassed children return to school?

So you may take it that I could not find a jug, really, I should have used the internet in the first place.......!

MOTIVATING? MY ASS!

Do you remember the ancient Pepsi commercial


Lip smackin thirst quenching great tastin motivation ever givin cool livin Pepsi

well I just made up one of my own.

Ass lickin, side windin,double dealin,nit pickin,back stabbin,addle pated, non compos imbecilic........ guess who?
C'mon,it;s easy.

SWIMMING THROUGH TREACLE !

What a day! No sleep again last night and a bad attack of the Brentford Boogie in to the bargain,which kept me awake until five this morning. My son arrived home from work and found me spark out,bless the boy he made coffee and toast but I was hard pressed to stay awake long enough to eat it.


I did not surface again until eleven and when I did it was on very wobbly legs and with a splitting headache. Pa had been up for a while and was hungry so I made a quick breakfast of hot buttered crumpets and then began to work my way through the days chores.

Having been informed by my son that he had on has last t shirt I decided that I really must tackle the ironing, I found the laundry basket full of unironed t shirts which came as no surprise. Thankfully the day was cooler and I managed to get through a good half of the load before I caved in and left the rest for another day.

Much time was spent preparing dinner as I had promised the boys a special fish dish. For Pa and I pan fried salmon,rosti,sliced runner beans and home ad Hollandaise sauce, for my son herb and crumb crusted cod with rosti. runner beans and a spiced tomato sauce.

Since I was taking the trouble to make Hollandaise,which I love I made a double amount so that I can make eggs Benedict for tomorrows breakfast. Dinner was well received and only slightly marred by the salmon being smoked and although my son does not like fish the cod was cooked to suit his taste and so it went down well.

Four egg yolks for the Hollandaise meant that there were four egg whites sitting in a bowl and so Pavlova seemed the obvious answer , I quickly popped one in the oven and then went out to pick fruit.

By dinner time I was exhausted and very glad that I had done all the prep for the meal earlier. I decided that in light of my late attack of the you know what,s that it would be wise to decorate the pavilion with something other than fruit and served it instead with a large scoop of chocolate iced cream and fresh whipped cream............we ate the lot!..

On shaking legs I staggered to the stair lift and almost wept with gratitude as I travelled slowly up the stairs. Now as I sit at my desk all is quiet for the moment ,all but the summer sound of the water spinner giving a much needed drink to my pumpkins and squashes.

Tonight I must try to sleep, or at least not to prowl about as is my usual custom, I feel very wobbly but the feeling will,I hope ,be gone by morning. Today has felt like a battle ,like attempting to swim in a pool full of treacle and just staying on my feet has been a challenge,but now I can take a warm shower and relax for a while,before ,I hope sleeping soundly for once.

DAMSON FESTE !

A FEAST OF DAMSONS

With the game season almost upon us and a glut of ripe damsons in the orchard you might,if you have lots of damsons yourself like to freeze a few pounds for winter use. The following dish is a family recipe, rich and delicious for a chilly autumn day.



STEW POT VENISON

2 lb venison meat,shoulder is best

seasoned flour

1oz butter

2tablespoons of cooking oil

1 pint of red wine

a good grating of nutmeg

1 blade of mace

salt and pepper

half a pound of stoned damsons( the damsons must be ripe,soft and sweet)

8 crushed juniper berries tied in a muslin bag with the mace.



Cut the venison into chunks and dust with the seasoned flour, Heat the butter eighth the oil in a frying pan and brown the venison quickly then put it in to a lidded casserole.



Pour the wine in to the frying pan scraping up all the brown crystals and juices then pour the liquid over the met in the casserole.

Add the stoned damsons and stir before cooking in the oven at 350oC for 2 hours. Remove the bag of spices before serving with creamed celeriac and glazed carrots,or mashed potato with carrot and parsnip.



Of course while the heat continues the last thing on anyone’s mind is stew so how about this.



Damson milk shake



quarter pound of stewed stoned damsons, sweetened to taste.

1 ping of fresh chilled milk

3 scoops of iced cream.



Put the milk in to a blender ,then add the damsons and blitz well.

Strain the liquid through a nylon sieve to remove pieces of damson skin.

Return to the blender ,add the iced cream and blitz again until frothy,

Serve in chilled glasses.



Stewed damsons can be added to yoghurt for a healthy snack and are really good with chilled rice pudding.



Twiggy's tree house is in a damson tree and at the moment she is being bombarded by half eaten damsons which he been disguarded by the parakeets........Her Majesty is not amused!

I just cannot be asked

Coming as I do from the northern moorlands I confess that I find this level of heat oppressive,today I finally gave up trying to work through the heat. Last night was spent lying starkers under a mosquito net ,rising occasionally to wring out my pillow or stand under a cold shower. During the past week we have noted the increase in the number of mozzies and their vicious attacks have plagued us all, but it is their high pitched whining hum which annoys me the most ;even jungle strength mozzie lotion does nothing to daunt these little horrors.




Sticky ,weary and tousled it was a reluctant trio who assembled at the breakfast table,rather later than usual, for breakfast en famile . Sundays are gaming days and at the moment the Sunday game is played in our kitchen so late as we were, although we ate in haste the first guest had arrived well before breakfast was over.



As the kitchen was to be the scene of battle Pa and I washed up in record time an left the warriors to it. Now I had the day free and for once there was no baking to do and I was thankful,hot as it had already become. I had no intention of doing the ironing and it was far too hot to work in the garden, even the cat twiggy was,by eleven in the morning was flaked out in her shady tree house where she was to remain for the rest of the day.



As I sat at my desk ,making believe to write I began to nod off almost at once and at last gave up the struggle, stripped off and returned to the protection of my mozzie net and fell asleep at last.

Dinner,was very late as the battle raged for longer than usual than usual, it was the fastest stir fry in history and non the worse for that.



As I write darkness is falling fast and although it is still sweltering a light breeze has sprung up and the stirring in the air is pleasant. I have a glass of chilled beer and fully intend to have another before long.



Tomorrow whatever the weather there will be bread to bake and we shall all swing in to action as the new working week begins.

My blog has been as boring as the day has been,noteworthy only for the fact that today I did practically nothing at all, thankfully a rare occurrence.

CHESHIRE CHEESE SAUSAGES WITH DAMSON CHUTNEY

Summer having arrived at last with hours of bright sunshine has caused the damsons to ripen fast and now the race is on to get them picked and preserved before they become over ripe and lose their pectin ,or  are eaten by wasps and our large population of wild parakeets! The following recipes are old ones but they are a firm favourite with us.
Vary the type of cheese to suit your own taste of course ,although i do find that melting cheeses such as Cheddar make the cooking a little difficult, cheeses which crumble are best.



DAMSON CHUTNEY

4lb damsons stoned (Ghastly job but worth the trouble)

6 oz dried fruit

1 tablespoon of pickling spice

1 teaspoon of salt

1 teaspoon of ground ginger

half a pint of vinegar

1lb Demerara sugar.

Simmer the damsons and dried fruit,pickling spice (tied in a small muslin bag),salt and ground ginger in a heavy bottomed pan with just enough of the vinegar to prevent the mixture from burning.

Cook gently until the fruit is soft,stirring occasionally.

Add the remaining vinegar and sugar stirring until the sugar has dissolved.

Boil the mixture until it is thick then remove the spice bag and disguard.

Pour in to clean hot jars and seal.

This chutney may be eaten at once.

While the weather remains hot we often find that we do not care for meat dishes ,the following recipe is an old one and one of our favourites.

CHESHIRE CHEESE SAUSAGES

5 oz fresh bread crumbs

1 medium onion finely chopped

3 oz Cheshire cheese crumbled.

1 tablespoon of fresh parsley,or tarragon chopped

quarter teaspoon of dry mustard

3 eggs

flour

extra bread crumbs for coating

fat for frying (I use dripping but vegetable fat will do.

Mix together the breadcrumbs,onion,tarragon,cheese ,seasoning and mustard.

Beat together two eggs and one yolk bad add to the mixture to bind it, if the mixture is still too dry add a little milk

Divide in to 12 sausage shapes and roll in the flour

Beat the remaining egg and white until frothy, brush over the sausages and then roll in the bread crumbs. Chill for 30 minutes then fry until golden brown.

Serve with the chutney and a mixed salad
If are careful to buy the right cheese this makes a great meal for vegetarians .

Our new neighbours have moved in and on first impression they seem very nice.
My little cat is ignoring me at the moment,on Friday I treated her for fleas,a thing she detests,she has not spoken to me since. All blandishments having failed I shall have to endure Her Majesties huff until further notice.

BREAKFAST AT THE CAFE AVIE

Breakfast on Friday is always very late these days,as every other week my son and I do the shopping early and eat on our return. Morning found me in considerable pain and my son was obliged to go without me a fact which he took rather better than I expected,off he went while I took a large dose of codeine before venturing gingerly down stairs.




Pa was up,which meant that I was late which would not do as we had a guest for breakfast so leaving Pa to tidy his room I went back upstairs to clean and dust my own, From my bedroom window I could see a good deal of activity as our illustrious landlord having originally placed a rent of £1,800 per month ,no new carpet, and no white goods had, after several months of derisive comments from prospective tenants and ardent pleading from the letting agent,had a change of heart.



Yesterday a “Let By” notice went up and today the new fridge freezer,cooker heated towel rail etc. arrived and were installed by the parks electrician ,who,finding himself next door to the Café Avie at his break time called in for a pot of tea (English Breakfast) and shortbread fingers (Wholemeal). He was prepared to sing for his breakfast and in fact seemed rather relieved to get off his chest Th following tale.



When the Estate Manager ( may his wax jacket melt) realised that if he wanted to let the house he needed to lower the price and install the basic white goods he also decided to chose then himself. This was not good judgement as he is unfamiliar with the dimensions of the kitchen next door. On attempting to install the fridge freezer the electrician discovered that no matter how he hung the doors they would not open fully due to lack of space,for either a door or a work top was in the way.



Following instructions he installed it any way,he told us “It will be fine so long as they do not buy any large joints of meat.”

Now why would you install something so obviously wrong? Well of course that answer is that true to form the Estate manager left the matter until the last moment and the new tenant is to move in tomorrow. New appliances had been promised and new appliances they have,the fact that they will not operate correctly is apparently by the way.



The cooker is the cheapest piece of tat I ever saw and the heated towel rail is just large enough to hold a small face flannel! There is potentially the prospect f a very troublesome day for is tomorrow,as on Saturday,s the Estate Manager does not work, the Facilities Manager(may he be visited by a plague of haemorrhoids) is still on holiday. When the new tenants realise their predicament we will be the only people too whom they will be abode to sound off as it ha s been made known to all that Pa is still,technically employed by the Estate.



Coincidentally our old neighbour will be with us for breakfast tomorrow which will add a certain frisson to the occasion.



Many of the days chores went undone today as I was, unfortunately not well enough to do them and my son, poor boy is also feeling pretty grim. Pa is , for once the last one standing.....for how long,who can say? In the mean time it has been decided that an very early night shall be had by all in the hope that we shall all fell better in the morning. Let us pray!

man hauling mama back home!!

My son,having been glued to his keyboard all week working on his latest novel,was rather pleased when I suggested that we go exploring along the canal tow path, With my scooter newly returned from the repair shop after having a small fortune spent upon gears, tyres, lights and switches felt confident that she would be fin;and so it was that with a fully charged battery and a basket of cold drinks we set of on our adventure.




Quite recently I discovered Elthorne Park , a special place full of wild rabbits,coots and herons and with a wonderful view over trees and park land to a real horizon,a thing much missed by us former hill dwellers. Knowing that my son would love it I suggested this walk and he was delighted.,we had fortunately remembered to take our cameras....unfortunately neither of us had remembered to pick up our mobile phones before leaving home.



About a mile out we discovered this discrepancy but ,rash fools that we were we felt only that it made our holiday from chores more complete,a nonsensical notion that we were soon to bitterly regret.



All along the way there were lovely thing to be seen and if it had not been for the noise of traffic from a near by motorway it would have been easy to imagine ones self deep in the countryside. Tiny mallard chick and young moor hens abounded and everywhere fat glossy blackberries ,sweet as can be adorned the hedgerows. Bryony and wood nightshade festooned the hawthorn hedges where the haws were already ripening fast.



We reached the park and wandered through the many paths e brow of the arriving at last at the brow of the hill where we gazed at the view like starving men with a feast before them. I have not seen such a horizon for fifteen years and I confess to being close to tears.



Trundling further a long a smooth track we decided that we should consider returning so I put on a little speed to gain the turning space when suddenly ,with out warning the scooter stopped,she stopped so sharply that I was thrown on to the tiller;the acute pain this caused told me that I had probably dislodged a kidney stone...help!



We now realised that leaving home without our phones had been stupid in the extreme,but there was not time for repining and my valiant son began the arduous task of pushing both me and the scooter home................a full three miles!!!

We had climbed the rather steep hills in happy anticipation of the view, now we face having to get the scooter down these hills without the aid of brakes as the only way to push the scooter is by knocking her out of gear and since the gears are the only brakes she has the problem is obvious.



I had to remain on the scooter in and so with my teeth firmly clenched we began the descent. Manfully my son used all his strength to hold the scooter back on the down hill slopes and even more manfully did he strain to push both the scooter and its occupant on the uphill sections.



A bridge,picturesque but dreadfully steep almost proved our undoing for although he managed to push the scooter up the steep slope ,as he came down the other side the weight pulled her away from him and she was for a few seconds out of control,then my son stopped her by the expeditious use of hi boot under the tyre.

I had been holding his hat as he pushed and it was with horror that I realised it was no longer on my knee.......it had gone!



Apologies seemed insufficient as my son stumped off up the tow path to find the missing hat,leaving me parked by a nest of tiny ducklings and feeling dreadful. With his hat back where it belonged we pressed on having no idea at all of the time. Shops were closing,it must be late Pa would be so worried....................hmmmmm!

On our return his casual hello told us that we had not been much missed,still all was well and as I did not feel like cooking we ordered Pizza and iced cream.

Of course now I am back to square one with my scooter and I must admit that my confidence has taken a nose dive since this latest breakdown,yet I cannot go back to b was before the scooters arrival .

That worry must be for another day,for now we are all safe at home,and that is all that matters.

WE FEAST

Ever since the day when our freezer decided to defrost itself a few days before Christmas the feast which followed this catastrophe has gone in to the family history as one of the best meals ever.


On that occasion the table was laden with a huge turkey, a brace of pheasant, a guinea fowl a large joint of beef and about three pounds of sausages.

Roasting that little lot took all day but when ,at last we sat down to dinner there was enough for a small army.
Served with nothing more than trenchers of bread and a salad this meal looked spectacular and was very much enjoyed by all those who participated in the feast,


Since that time I have often been asked to “Do it again” and while cost and time prohibit such an indulgence I do from time to time prepare a scaled down version of this memorable meal.

On the menu today. Pork Belly flavoured with a paste made from freshly milled spices which have been cooked in olive oil before being rubbed into the well scored joint.

Chicken breasts coated in a well seasoned flour and pan fried in clarified butter and fresh herbs

Potato salad, made from our own potatoes,baked and creamed courgettes,cherry tomatoes,spring onions ,salad, trenchers and a few tortilla thrown in for good measure.
All was going well...too well..the pork was roasting and making the whole house smell wonderful and with the chicken ready to cook at the last minute I had....correction ,should have had plenty of time e to clean the bathroom.

Half way through the cleaning at well past four I answered a knock on the door which proved to be the electrician come to fit a replacement extractor fan in the bathroom. Not unfortunately the electricians who worked on our house a few weeks ago but the estate electrician who is more unfortunately still the most messy artisan I have ever encountered During the hour which he spent hammering and banging in an attempt to dislodge the old one I watched nervous;y as the pile of brick dust grew and his dirty hands hovered near the newly painted walls and the even more newly cleaned tiles.


By the time he left their was brick dust every where an I had to begin the job all over again. Down stairs the pork was cooked,unfortunately I was not ready to pan fry the butterflied chicken breasts, cream the courgettes or prepare the salad......bum!

I whirled around the bathroom like a crazy woman and when I had finished left my son to put the cleaning things away while I sped off to rescue our feast and with much jiggery pokery between us we saved the day. OK. We ate almost two hours late and the pork crackling was not as crisp as I would have liked but all was well and the boys and I tucked in with enjoyment

.We would of course never be able to eat so much at once but the left overs will make excellent sandwiches for supers and of course our little cat will have her share.

Post script.

When the fan was turned on after dinner......it co,mes on with the light. A cloud of brick dust flew out of the blasted gadget and ,positioned as it is directly over the kitchen door ,

the dust cloud blew right in to the kitchen and settled................everywhere.......***!!!!**!.

LOOSE ENDS,LIDS AND LABELS

Most of today has been spent doing odd jobs such a finally labelling all the preserves,pottering about in the garden which in our house is known as tatting about;and beating Pa's room full of junk in to submission. Spurred on by the imminent arrival of a six panel screen the old boy has been tidying up and has actually thrown out a load of junk of his own accord!




His is a lovely room with a fire place, a huge desk, the biggest most comfy easy chair you ever sat on,book cases which match his desk; in fact everything has been done to make him comfortable .

Thus far we have failed to maintain any semblance of order there in spite of the fact that he has more storage for his personal used than my son and I have collectively.



Half way through the afternoon the screen arrived and I was surprised at how excited Pa was on it's arrival. I had chosen it with care so that it should be sturdy without being too heavy, attractive,of course and very large,Close examination proved its suitability and Pa was delighted with it. It's early arrival seemed to spur Pa on and he put in a great deal of effort tidying his room while the cat looked on in amazement.

After such a busy day there had been no time for preparing an elaborate evening meal and so we agreed that scrambled eggs and sausages on toast would fit the bill nicely, as an apology promised the boys a feast day tomorrow...why oh why did I do that?



Pa's sleeping area is now beautifully screened from the rest of the room,his railway cupboard is easier to accesses,in fact the whole room is now more functional and a great deal more attractive.................IF it stays that way for more than a couple of days I may not survive the shock!



I spent a little time out of doors today collecting camomile, the wild variety which I dry in large quantities and use as a hair rinse,as a tea,and as a wonderful foot soak. I used to use it in the bath,but now that we have a shower instead that is no longer possible. English Marigold petals too have many cosmetic uses as well as culinary ones and we grow lots of these vibrant beauties each year.



With the weather dry I last I am making haste to dry as many herbs as possible of the summer kind,such herbs as rosemary and sage stay green all winter so tarragon ,marjoram,and lemon thyme are dried each summer and stored away for winter use. I detest dried Parsley and would prefer to do without when fresh is unobtainable,chives to are not very pleasant as a dried herb, fortunately we have plenty of early wild garlic, the leaves of which are wonderfully fresh even in the depths of January in our sheltered orchard.



With the kitchen resembling a Mages cave at the moment and with preserving in full swing there are cauldrons full of bubbling brews and baskets of fruit everywhere,this makes navigating the kitchen a little awkward;yet it is a time of the year we all love,as we squirrel away our winter stores,and look forward the eating of all these lovely goodies.

SWEET STAFFORDSHIRE PICKLE

I was today obliged to spend a great deal of time pasting labels on to jam,jelly and chutney jars,the kitchen being so full that until they were stored away no more preserves could be made.


In theory it is Pa who does the labelling but this year all entreaties threats and promises have e fallen upon deaf ears so it is a case of do it yourself Avie!



Ages passed and I had done only half the bottles,time was passing so I shelved (no pun intended) the rest of the job and began to prepare another batch of chutney which,unlike the Christmas chutney which needs three moths to mature is ready within three weeks.

SWEET STAFFFORDSHIRE CHUTNEY

1lb onions pee;de and chopped

2 lb dates stoned and chopped

2 lb apples peeled and cored

4oz walnuts chopped

1pint of vinegar

1 teaspoon salt

2 teaspoons ground ginger

1lb sugar

Place the onions in to a large heavy based pan with a little water,bring to the boil and simmer until soft. Add the apples and continue to cook for fifteen minutes then put in the walnuts,dates,salt and spice and half the vinegar. Cook until the mixture thickens then add the sugar and the rest of the vinegar. Boil until the mixture becomes really thick then bottle in sterile jars.



Matured in three weeks this is a great Autumn pickle and is a must if the Christmas pickle is to survive long enough to mature. Try this with a real vintage Cheddar or a good red Leicester.

Time for a change

Pa's room,as I may have mentioned before is never tidy,and as I am sure I have mentioned before this is exacerbated by the fact that Pa is a hoarder. Left to his own devices he would have the room stacked from floor to ceiling with railway magazines, memorabilia and model railway parts.




Pa's model railway operates on the Robert Louis Stevenson principle “it is better to travel hopefully than to arrive.” It has been under construction for over thirty years and so far all that has run on the track are spiders,and plenty of them. Pa's railway is rather like a government project in that it costs a fortune and may never be finished



Now anyone will tell you that I am a patient soul so far as Pa's little weakness is concerned but the amount of tat stuck about in any available corner or crevice has reached such a proportion that we are literally reduced to a corridor to walk through when entering his room and I and certain that the fire risk would be sufficient to void our insurance should the worst befall.



My son and I made a start,you will remember last June since when the accumulation has increased alarmingly. Today with the riot act read I set about tackling this mass of trash,this may sound harsh but really I want to make Pa as comfortable as possible so in order to do this space needed to be made.



With the room striped and the cupboards and shelves emptied I set about rearranging the furniture which was to test my cure for arachnophobia to the utmost. Behind the Railway cabinet I discovered the fairest crop of spiders I have ever encountered,huge, hairy and bloody annoyed at have been disturbed. Rash fool that I am I had, due to the heat of the day elected to work in a long flowing kaftan,as the dark corners were exposed to sunlight for the first time in ages the whole tribe made a dash for my trailing skirt;it was like watching the tide coming in!



Horrified I was about to flee the scene when I remembered my talisman and instead I carefully swept them in to a dustpan and evicted the whole kit and caboodle!



It will ,of course take a day or two to complete the job but the room now looks light and airy and more spacious. I have ordered a lovely screen for Pa to put around his bed for a touch of luxury and with soft chair,cushions and a variety of lighting he will be snug this coming autumn.

Of course Pa will never keep the room nice without an occasional boot up the backside but the poor old love deserves a bit of comfort.....weather he wants it or not!!!!!

THE DISTANCE OF A YEAR

Where did the year go? Suddenly I am again plunged again into to quarts of vinegar,baskets of fresh fruit,raisins and spices. Some times it almost seems as if I can measure my life by these seasonal chores.


With the house to myself I fell to thinking about some of the many other years when this seasonal job was in hand,for once a sadness settled upon me as I remembered all those dear ones who are no longer here to taste the results of my labours.
My Father ,who taught me to make the special Christmas chutney which I made again today and who died twenty nine years ago.

Grandfather,kind and patient, granny bustling and not at all patient as far as children were concerned. My cousin,just a year older than myself who died last year,and so many friends,now gone. Of course new friends come ,but there are some special  people in ones life who cannot be spared and whose loss is felt for ever.



Mourning takes many forms and there are some griefs from which I am sure there is no recovery, Not every day is marred by loss, one forgets for a time and then the pain returns with such a force of devastation that it seems the grief is new,raw,agonising. The mind shies away from the bleak emptiness,the huge hole in ones life that gapes like a wound and is terrible to contemplate.



When my work was done I took a ride to one of my quite places to have my cry out before returning home to prepare our meal. My grief is my own, it is all that is left of something so absorbing and intense and  which cannot be shared,it lives within my secret self,and yet today the ache is so dreadful that I long to talk to some one;but it won’t do.



I shall regret this blog the moment it is posted and so to make some use of this out pouring of mawkishness let me say this,savour every moment, treasure every memory, enjoy all that is precious to you while it is in your power to do so. These things do not last for ever,the sadness they leave behind, often does.

BUSY IN THE KITCHEN ,LAZY BY THE RIVER

I needed and early start this morning as there was the bread to bake before breakfast, and today we were entertaining.


Granary bread was requested ,which happens to be my favourite and today's requirements consisted of two split tin loaves three baguettes and a bloomer which I rolled in sunflower kernels,;the later to be eaten tomorrow with ham and cheese omelettes for dinner.



The loaves had just gone in to the oven as our breakfast guest arrived for a feast of pancakes and lemon,I love making pancakes and there are so many things to do with any left overs.

We have become quite famous for our varies breakfast menu and we have many guests these days.

Our guest today was an old friend who often takes breakfast or afternoon tea in out kitchen, he and his wife have been so very kind and helpful to us over the years that we have a special arrangement that if he is working close by he eats with us. He is such fun, a mine of amusing stories and exactly the sort of company Pa needs,so these two chatted and laughed like school boys while I kept their plates full and their tea cups brimming.



Twelve noon saw the washing up done and the jam pan bubbling away merrily and full of the blackberry and apple juice I made yesterday,this glorious confection will grace the Christmas table as an accompaniment to cold ham,turkey and game. Many jars will find their way in to the store cupboards of friends as a jar of something home made make a great Christmas gift and is always liked.



By the time the jelly was made and the kitchen,which was smeared with red jelly had been cleared I was very tired and hot ,but still having the beef burgers to make I pressed on.

I have ,I believe given this recipe before so suffice it to say that once the six juicy little patties were ensconced in the refrigerator I decided to escape for an hour so off I went.



Footling about on the scooter with no where particular to go is an unusual occupation ,so that on the odd occasion that it happens I make the most of the chance.

Trundling along the river bank,watching the water-birds, cormorants fishing off the head of the island and hanging their wings out to dry in the sun.

Silly geese rolling over and over in the water as they bathed and fish rising to snap up the dancing insects on the surface of the water.



Finding a quiet place in London can be tricky but I have, over the years discovered a few lonely spots and it is to these that I fly when ever I have the opportunity. Time to be quite is rare for me as is time to just sit and gaze at the river and I always feel the better for it.



Home to dinner and the arrival of my new boots,,a gorgeous pair of “Blowfish”denim ankle boots, brand new which I acquired for just sixteen pounds, a terrific bargain as the next cheapest price for these boots was forty five pounds.



Dinner was a success and the boots a perfect fit and for me it was almost the end of a perfect day,a day of renewed friend ship, a day on which I felt that I had accomplished all that I had set out to do and the arrival of the boots crowned the evening.



My only worry is my son who will I hope soon be leaving his slave driver of an employer,for me it cannot be too soon...........................!

BLACKBERRY AND APPLE JELLY

3 lb blackberries

3lb cooking apples

3 pints water

sugar

Wash the apples and chop roughly then rinse the blackberries and put them in to a large maslin pan with the apples and 3 pints of water

Bring to the boil and simmer until the fruit is tender, check that the fruit is pulped .

Line a large bowl with a scalded jelly bag then pour in the fruit pulp.

Tie the top of the jelly bag with string and suspend over the bowl. I use an old camera tripod for this but a stool will do. Leave to strain over night.

Discard the pulp in the bag then measure the liquid in to a large jam pan and add 1il of sugar for each pint of liquid.

Heat the liquid but do not boil .once the liquid is warm add the sugar and bring to the boil stirring constantly until the sugar has all dissolved.

Boil until setting point is reached then skim if necessary and bottle quickly in sterile jars.

I sterilise jam jars by putting them on a tray in to a cold oven then bringing the temperature up to 100oC. The lids I places on a metal tray and pour on boiling water , leave for five minutes them dry on clean kitchen paper.

The hot jam and the hat jars will, when the lids are tightened cool and cause a vacuum to form thus preserving the jam far more effectively than wax disks and cellophane toppers.

THE PRICE OF FREEDOM

Today the price turned out to be a very late evening meal and the reason for this strange occurrence? I was gallivanting about in the lanes and by the canal picking blackberries, chatting to bargemen and, oh joy, watching rabbits playing on the pathways and among the bushes.




Magical does not do justice to the wonder of just rambling about in the comparative countryside among the water birds and small creatures who inhabit these rare and precious places. On my travel I passed a canal boat named “piper at the gates of dawn” it could not have been more in keeping with the strange calm and the mystical wonder of the place.



The further I rambled the fewer people I encountered and soon I was quite alone ,this is when the rabbits appeared on a grassy rise just in front of me as I rounded a bend. I have not encountered a rabbit for many years,well not a live one ; and my surprise and complete happiness almost made me forget my camera, which for once I had with me.

The bunnies posed prettily and showed little fear, I was entranced.



Blackberries had been my excuse for a run and so I set about picking some of the largest ,ripest beauties I have seen since I left my Northern home. These with some apples will make a delicious jelly to accompany our cold meats or to add to winter stews. But,oh dear, I quite forgot the time.



I had made white bread in the morning especially as I was also making Cawl for dinner and white bread does go well with this dish. Next we had a visitor for breakfast and then....hip.hip. Hoorah. My scooter arrived back from the repair shop after an absence of six weeks Blackberies

The identical moment that the chores were done I grabbed my coat and camera, a few bags for the blackberries and off I went.



Never mind the thundery sky, bother the ironing and to blazes with cooking ,the day was mine and I found the freedom heady stuff.



So to shorten a long story I was over two hours late in beginning preparations for dinner,and further more I did not give a damn. My head and my heart were full of the lovely new places I had visited. A country park the existence of which I was in complete ignorance until stumbled across an over grown sing which I followed. So much to see I could not go back and kept promising myself that I would turn around at the next bend in the lane.



Oh, but at the next bend were moor hen chicks and  coots with young and I could just make out an old bridge which of course I must see. Finally, of course, I had to turn and return home.....late



Both the boys were understanding and I finally got the meal on the table at seven thirty,instead of five fifteen! The as my son needed to be leaving for work I was obliged to do the evening chores by myself ,and tidy the kitchen, and sort through the laundry ,as Pa was taking his bath.



Was it worth it? Oh yes, yes,yes, yes.

LATE SOUNDS ,SWEET AND SOUR!

I spend a good deal of the not wide awake and in the summer time when the night air is warm I always have my bedroom windows wide open,with the breeze blowing through the room it sometimes feels at times as though I am out side in the dark orchard.




Ten until midnight voices are the main feature, people arguing. Very occasionally a fight breaks out mostly boy girl arguments...very dull as I rule and on one memorable occasion a poor soul totally inebriated and hopelessly lost banged on the doors of various houses in the lane for hours until ,worn out he fell asleep in a garden shortly before the police arrived to put him in a safe place while he sobered up.



After midnight the voices cease and cars,usually being driven much to quickly whiz up and down the lane. Aeroplanes are fewer but still noisy.Gradually these sounds cease and then for me the night begins.



Sounds unheard during the busy noisy day are wonderfully audible. Soft summer evenings bring the sibilant sound of the leaves rustling softly, soothing and calming after a busy day.

Nights can be so still that even these sounds disappear and nights such as this the rustling is made by hedgehogs foraging below my windows. Foxes call to each other,a greeting,a warning and cubs snarl as the play fight among my flower beds.



Blackbirds rally do sing in the dead of night ans we have Nightingales too...bliss.



Ear splitting crashes are not uncommon when the badgers visit,their favourite trick is to upturn the flower pots in search of chaffer grubs;so many pots have been smashed in this way that I am replacing them with plastic ones,not as attractive but much more durable.



Annoying sounds like the high pitched hum of mosquitoes worry me no longer as last year I equipped us all with mosquito nets...no more bumps in the night! From time to time an ambulance or a police car scream by after which the silence is ,for a time absolute,but never for long.



A moth battering its poor wings against the window glass can be deafening and should a flying beetle manage to get in to my room bumbling and bumping about the ceiling I have the amusement of catching them and releasing them again.



In the light of the street lamps bats try their luck among the many insects drawn to the brightness,some of the hornets are almost as large as the pipistrell bats which haunt our lane in their dozens.



Four in the morning brings the return of the aeroplanes,not many at first but the number increases as the time passes,now the cars return,using the lane s a short cut to avoid the traffic lights. Delivery drivers,milk men ,post men join the procession until at last the lane is busy again with people taking Rover or Trixy for an early morning walk. Night is over and the noisy day begins.



From five to seven with the television on I sleep.



The past week has seen a departure from this comparatively “easy country charm” for every night for the past six days the burglar alarm at the house opposite has blared,bleeped and flashed for hours. He house holders are away,and the police;who have been called several times a night by several sleepless householders) do not,and I quote”Usually turn out for burglar alarms on private dwellings,”

Makes you think doesn,t , all those companies selling security appliances which only serve to keep the neighbours awake.

The person I spoke to when I called asked me if I could see any lights on in the property,my view of the large house concerned is the rear view of the house and I could see no sing of either lights or life.



The person informed me that unless I could see something like a flash light beam she could not pass the message on to a patrol. I pointed out that

1. I could only see a small proportion of the house so that only the Gods knew what was occurring at the front .

2. The occupants could all be lying with their throats cut.

3. Surely no self respecting burglar would signal hiss presence by flashing a torch about for all to see.

Unimpressed by my remarks the person asked if I could go out in to the street to have a look,so of course I told her that I was disabled and not in the habit of mooching about the lane at two in the morning at the best of ties an certainly not when their might be burglars about.

She sounded quite put out and made me feel that *I was being singularly unhelpful and that since I was unable to help any further at the moment I should call back should anything else occur. This seemed tantamount to asking me to stake out the place... no thank you.



For the past few nights I and the rest f the residents in along the lane have resorted to earplugs and to hell with the police! If they cannot be asked we are sure that we are all better off in bed. There is just one thing which worries me, no one has seen the occupants who are reputed to be on holiday.....or their staff who are not...odd don't you think?

CARROT AND LENTIL SOUP

With the return of the yukky weather the craving for hot soup has also returned and as today is a bread baking day I decided to make a summer soup which we all love.




1 lb carrots peeled and thinly sliced

half a pound of red lentils

I lb onions peeled and finely sliced

3pints of vegetable stock

salt and pepper

bouquet garni made of thyme marjoram and tarragon.

Half a pint of cream

2 cloves of garlic crushed

Peel and chop the carrots

2 oz butter

1 tblsp plain flour

2 teaspoons mild curry powder if liked mixed with a little water.



Heat the butter in a large heavy bottomed saucepan ,dust the onion rings in the flour and cook very slowly in the butter until soft and golden,this takes about ten minutes.

Add the sliced carrots garlic , bouquet garni and stock then season with salt and pepper. Bring to the boil then add the lentils and simmer for thirty minutes until the carrots are soft and the lentils have begun to dissolve.

Blitz the soup in a liquidizer of pass through a sieve. Mix the curry in to the soup and simmer gently for a further thirty minutes then add the cream. Serve hot.

I find the soup quite flavoursome enough without the curry but if you like a little heat it certainly gives the dish a real lift.

At home I would serve this soup with crust home made bread but croutons are also quite acceptable and garlic bread sticks also make a change.



An old primary school friend of my sons visited us this afternoon,he is one of the few people who are taller than my son which singles him out from the crowd. We are all very fond of this young man and it makes me very happy that whenever he come home to see his parents he always looks us up too. He spent a great deal of time at our home as a child, he was a dear little boy and has grown into a fine young man who we are proud to know.



Today I began to make the winters supply of Apple and Thyme Jelly and to my shame I was obliged to purchase the apples my own crop having been a dismal failure. No one hereabouts has any Bramleys.H owgates or any other cooking apple and the price in the shops reflects the apparent nation wide shortage.

This years chutney will most likely be made of damsons instead of apples as by the time I have made the Apple and Blackberry , Apple and Elderberry and Apple and Rose Hip the expense will be enough.



Damsons are so plentiful that excepting for some serious mishap Damson Wine made by my neighbour and Damson Gin made by myself should be abundant. Much of our home made produce is given as gifts at Christmas and on other occasions and ,also to local charities which we supply with hampers to be auctioned at village fairs etc. it is a good way to raise money ,last year one lady alone purchased twenty pounds worth of tickets for one of our hampers.



Well done to all those competing at the London Olympics,we were especially delighted when Mo Farah won gold as he went to the same school as my son and is just a year younger. Apart from being a great athlete he is a great role model who,s love of sport kept him on the straight and narrow. We need more lads like him!

ALL GROWN UP

Remember when buttercups were tall and their golden pollen,


Stained your dress as their waist high glory, gilded the afternoon.

Small bosky places were filled with mystery and became in turn

Caves, palaces and dungeons deep as deep, and an old oak stump a castle keep.



Blue distance on a hazy August day, a faraway land where perhaps,

A fairy Queen held sway. Perhaps in that strange distance

Elephants and lions roared and ruled .Another day, Red Indian brave, s stalked

The soft eyed deer, or terrible dragon, s walked.



Nothing lost upon a child’s eye, bright as a robin’s and as quick

To see anything good berries for a crown and golden wheat straw.

Apples, ransom for a King or a fearless outlaws hoard,

Won with great valour and a wooden sword.



Tell me now, what is it that you see, over by the woods edge

Arthur’s seat perhaps or just an old dead tree?

AAAAAAAAAARRGH !

Damn me for the fool that I am,damn and double damn!


I stupidly gave my repeat prescription to Pa after I had collected it on Thursday as he was to take it to the pharmacy for me first thing on Friday morning; pa being Pa he forgot.

This morning he set out to the pharmacy only to return half an hour later to ask me where the prescription was?

Curse me for a blithering idiot! Why did I leave it in his care? It was I suppose the triumph of faith over experience as this is the third time in a row that he has managed to mislay this important document.

He searched, I searched, we both searched every place that it could be a dozen times and the we search all the places that it could not possibly be over and over again.

In total I spent over an hour on this bootless project and as I was turning out my desk(where I knew it wasn't for the umpteenth time, he found it, stuck he said on the top of the refrigerator.

How did it arrive in that unlikely location? Your guess is as good as mine but by the time he left for the pharmacy again I was practically gibbering!

Over the years this performance of mislaying things at vital moments has been Pa's party piece and as I age I find his lackadaisical attitude more and more frustrating.

I cannot count how many times Pa and I have come to the end of a lovely meal on a special night out and when the time arrives to pay the bill …..here we go.....the frantic searching of his pockets begins.

He empties everything out on to the table trawling through the detritus muttering “I know I have it here somewhere”I have sat dying with excruciating embarrassment so often I have forgotten exactly how many times Pa has done this. Eventually of course he always found the damn thing but that is beside the point; the evening was always ruined!

I solved the problem eventually by refusing to go out to dinner with hi, ever again!

God help me, the number of times we have gone through the check out at the super market , the girl on the till announces the exorbitant sum we have manage to spend and of he goes.

Searching his pockets, my hand bag, scrabbling around in a mass of old receipts like a demented chicken scratching about for a worm. Only after an age of cringing embarrassment suffered while other shoppers tut tutted did he find the wretched thing in and obscure pocket of his jacket. I no longer take him shopping....ever!

Once we set off on A holiday to Pembrokeshire and half way their the car broke down.
Guess who had not remembered to pick up his A.A card? Got it in one.

That sorted while we waited for a tow home I was on the telephone arranging for a hire car to be delivered to our home so that we could set out again leaving our own car safely at the garage.

No problem I caught the car hire firm just as they were closing and they kindly agreed to deliver the car to our house where we would meet them, I paid over the phone with my own credit card.......yes we used them in those days... the went back in triumph to Pa and my son to tell them that I had saved the day. Pa seemed a little distant but we were half way home before he admitted that he did not have his driving licence on him, and in fact had no idea where it was,

Now you should know that I always asked him before the start of a journey to make sure he had this vital document. All the way home I was frantic and when we arrived at four in the afternoon we spent the next two hours tearing the house apart in trying to find the blessed thing............... We found it........in Pa's wallet where it had been the whole time stuck behind an old train ticket.

Hungry, drained and totally exhausted we set out for Pembrokeshire again at six thirty in the evening and although it was fun chasing the sun set all the way to the Bristol channel I was smouldering with a rage so severe that it took half a bottle of vodka to calm me down .

So why do I trust him with my prescription? Insanity I should think!

During the course of this week alone he has lost t the insurance certificate for the scooters and several appointment cards for hospital, by set of screwdrivers and a ball of blue tack.

Does he do it deliberately? Do you know that after forty years of marriage I cannot tell, BUT; should I ever be able to prove that he does,his end will be swift and my sentence a long one!