I wonder if anyone has
ever quantified the seemingly endless amount of tea drunk by
builders,plumbers,gas fitters etc? During the last three days we have
consumed a weeks supply of Yorkshire Tea,two packs of English
Breakfast Tea...both leaf tea of course, and half a very large jar of
coffee, twenty ISO drinks and half a bottle of gin(the latter
consumed by me.)
At the moment we had
three different professions digging up our yard, blasting hell out of
out two hundred year old drains and attempting to effect a cure for
our gas boilers chronic old age.
The gas fitter,a lovely
young chap feels that it is gasping its last and a new one should be
fitted,the Estate has decided to fit a carbon monoxide
alarm.......yes well we are,as you may imaging full of confidence in
this hopeful measure!
Fortunately there are
so many draughts in our cottage that I doubt if there could b a
sufficient build up of gas to cause any trouble. My neighbour once
left his gas top on unlit all night with no ill effect what-so-ever!
This afternoon they
broke the news that they would be back next week to do some more
work,I feel that emigration may be the best answer to my troubles.
A conservation group of
which my son is chairman met tonight at our Local Pub, this meant
that dinner had to be at five thirty. We had just said goodbye to the
workmen .hoovered and steamed all the floors,and |I was about to
begin dinner when ,behold, another bunch of workmen, who will be
working here tomorrow turned up to have a look at the job.
They trudged through
the filthy yard straight through the house,I gave them tea and then
departed to my room where I wept silently with frustration until they
left. The alternative would have resulted in my receiving a long
prison sentence for G.B.H. or even murder.
I know that I have done
quite a lot of moaning during the last two days but even my renown
hospitality has its limits I find. For instance,if you arrived at
someone’s house and they were steaming the floor would you. A. Take
off you shoes and come in. B. Go away and come back at a more
convenient time. Or C. Trudge in with mud all over your boots,plonk
down in a chair and ask for a cup of tea. Consider these questions
rhetorical.
I have a party here on
Sunday, celebrating five birthdays , I am catering the party and I
mean to enjoy doing it. There will be three cakes...possibly more.
Sausage roll s ,mini quiches,salad cheeses new baked bread and a
large cold roast chicken with accompanying bacon rolls and blackberry
jelly.
Home made vegetable
crisps, cheese straws and anything else I can think of in the
meantime.
For this I shall need
my kitchen to be empty of all but myself and the cat. Quite how this
miracle will be achieved I cannot tell....perhaps a plague cross on
the front door,perhaps a banishing spell, maybe I could borrow my
neighbours Great Dane, a complete softy who is afraid of cats but
sounds like “The Hound of the Baskervilles”........we shall see.
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