MAYHEM AT THE CAFE AVIE

The problem began last Friday evening about half an hour after the,painters,joiners,gas fitters,plumbers etc. who had kept the Café Avie busy all last week had knocked off for the weekend.

A nasty smell and a small puddle in the yard became very quickly a foul stench and a small lake which waxed and waned according to the flushing of loo's and the running of baths and sinks.

The drains in these cottages are ancient, the Terra Cotta pipes are long since breached by the groping fingers of tree roots and as a consequence they block several time a year,this is the second time in two weeks.

The estate Managers,in a bid to save money decided that they would no longer have a duty manager to deal with problems arising during the weekend so this sort of thing happens all the time and causes no end of trouble. Spending three days in the midst of a smelly lake is no joke I can tell you.

I transpired that I had not been the only one with a waste water problem, a neighbours bosky garden was transformed into a mosquito haunted and foetid swamp,while another was obliged to cancel a weekend barbecue due to the inundation of his patio. All had left shirty answer phone messages and emails over the weekend.

Early this morning a man arrived with a set of drain rods,he knew the problem well enough to know that he was wasting his time but unfortunate for all of us his boss is a penny pinching numpty . He there fore followed the crackpot orders he had been given ,lost several of his rods,and was obliged to retire worsted from the scene,namely to my kitchen where breakfast was being served.

A plumber was called and in his own time(as is the way with plumbers) he arrived in time for a coffee and by the end of two hours a lot of water and an appalling reek of sewerage the effluent tide retreated, the man hole was covered and lunch was served.

By this time I had done three breakfast sittings and two lunches. Barely had I cleared lunch when the first callers for afternoon tea arrived and the short bread scones which I had managed to make in a ten minute lull began to vanish much too quickly for comfort.

The out house doors received their second coat of shiny black paint,and very smart the look. The cooker hood extractor fan was finished by the addition of a small piece of beading to fill the whole left by the fitter who had made to large a hole to begin with.

I washed up the ;last of the tea things at five thirty and began at once to prepare the cottage pie for dinner.

During the course of the day I had left the kitchen for less than an hour , including pee breaks!! My son informed me that I was the victim of ,my own hospitality and I suppose that might be argued.

I still feel that it is nicer if the workmen are happy while they work than otherwise,even if it does mean that I spend almost all day washing dishes.

With more work scheduled I think I may run an ad in the local rag: Wanted,good humoured hard working Pot Washer to assist in busy café environment. To begin work immediately......sooner if possible! PLEASE!